SoHopeful

Aghh..Its this habit I've tried to kick over and over again but keep relapsing.
Every time I come back its stronger, more raw and I'm hooked.
I can't sniff, roll or inhale hard enough until I'm given reason to quit again for the same reason I started.
Carpal Tunnel with a twitch of withdraw has me questioning my sanity - This isn't me.
But being forced to make the decision of being the story or telling it, the cold sweats keeps me up at night.
I just want to write.