Free me From My Invisible Chain

A poem About seeing the person you once loved with someone else

Free Me From My Invisible Chain

My eyes enraged as I see you passing

linking arms with whom was only a friend

don’t lie to me I know your heart

the true reason our relationship started to descend

As much as I hate you for what you have done

leaving me disconnected, lonesome, suicidal

My heart will belong to you always as you are my one

I used to smile every morning and before I went to bed

Treacherous lies breaking my heart

Now these times I truly dread 

Images like subliminal messages playing heart games

even viewing you with other people 

Won’t free me from my invisible chains

Remembering the good times In our loves embrace

Laughing, holding, Kissing,  

Now it pains me to see your face  

As you walk I feel it tugging causing me much pain

Tearing me from inside out 

This Relentless Invisible Chain

Author's Note

Please give honest reviews I feel this one weaker than my usual stuff Just feeling tired
Thanks for reading !!

Reviews

[Bailey C. Writing]

Hey, I really like this! I can practically feel everything that you've written. This is a good poem, well written, good structure, expresses feelings, etc.
Mind reviewing any of mine? Saw your forum :P

[Jonathan]

It good but dam man its a real downer
Felt that you came with energy but slowly
It started to drain from the poem. It is over all
Good, not great.

[Arabdha]

"As you walk I feel it tugging causing me much pain
Tearing me from inside out
This Relentless Invisible Chain"..loved the lines..and really liked the poem..it has an endearing honesty to it..

[freelancejouster]

i like this. there's something twisting beneath it...

[Dische]

This is a really great piece, it completely describes your emotion in a way that others, suck as myself, can relate to. Invisible chains is a really really great metaphore to say your attached to someone else. I really liked this a lot abd it is really great to know by reading this that I am not alone on this journey of love abd heartbreak, I could really feel the emotion in this poem, sorry if this review is all over the place. Thank you for posting such beautiful poetry abd keep it coming please.

Dische

[Margaret Marie Hubbard]

Just because you might not feel you have spoken eloquently, it does not mean that the message isn't clear. I get it completely. Sometimes artists tend to err on the side of perfectionism. I like it, but if you aren't happy then go for it!

[steph]

I agree with you ashley, This seems like one of your weaker poems. your not as discriptive, and the rhythm is slightly off. nothing wrong with the content, and I believe their is no such thing as a bad poem, I don't really feel though you have projected accurately the feeling you were trying to convey.. Its a work in the making, but Definately needs a little more work. The positive side of this poem is it has potential and with some fine tuning and a little "ashley finesse" it will turn out to be another remarkable piece..... thanks for sharing

[trainwreck]

Not your strongest, true, but it is still extremely well written and a well-crafted idea. It really gets your picture across.

[A]

I don't find it weaker than your rest pieces, it's very truthful and expressing of feelings we could all relate it, it's very realistic! And the title is very good as well, you could feel the pain and how much you're hurt, when the poem reaches out this way it means you did a great job :) Well done.

[GamingGal]

Pros: We all experience this pain sometime or another. When we see that special someone finally sorta moving on and finding someone else to love even though we still love them. And just seeing them causes an unbearable pain that you can't suppress, just makes you want to fall to the ground in tears. Yeah, I've been there. And I can definitely feel the emotion in this one. It's strong and powerful and emotional.

Cons: Nothing.

Overall: Good word choice, good set up of the stanzas, and good emotion. Pretty good :)