She Is Dying

She Is Dying

A Poem by The Flawed

 

 
She’s looking sick, she’s looking frayed
She’s looking old, she’s looking gray
Her sister visits every night,
But she’s lost the will, to live and to fight
I taught them love and harmony,
But they kill each other and they are killing me,
They’ve grown so vicious all my kids
How did they turn to such bad seeds?
I gave them all a good mother should,
I gave them shelter and I gave them food
Did I give too much?
Am I to blame?
They could have been so happy,
It’s such a shame,
I tried to teach them with all my might
To leave in peace and not to fight
 
Sister Moon is crying, mother Earth is dying
She’s looking sick, she’s looking frayed
She’s looking old, she’s looking gray
Is it really so surprising?
That my temperature keeps rising
Should I be apologizing?
For them, or to them
Or to you my beautiful radiant sister,
Sister Moon is weeping, mother Earth is sleeping
She’s looking sick, she’s looking frayed
She’s looking old, she’s looking gray
(And that night on the way home, the Moon thanked god for not having any children, and said a prayer for her sick sister, as she wept).

© 2009 The Flawed


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Featured Review

Wow! No suggestions. This hits a chord with me because I'm writing a story about a sentient planet. Like the reveal in the middle. I love when the writer gives life and consciousness to our world and the things around us. Great way to judge humanity from the outside looking in while being trapped inside. What ingrates we are. Good job.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Dying...a word that we all going to find out .. the meaning
a crazy way to explain there's no such a thing....
A path to go home...going home in a second
Mercy ... grace... love this poem

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This has great flow to it, could just about hear it as a song. Very tragic yet very well written poem. Very powerful in its pain.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This was so true and thoughtful.
I mean, I really loved this piece...It is definitely a very strong piece of writing and the opening lines are simply outstanding.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Congrats on your great winning poem.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This was a great piece! As soon as I discovered the characters, I re-read the poem again. It has a great message, and it flowed flawlessly together.
Good job!
~Lauren

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

WOW, this is powerful ! You have expressed the sentiment brilliantly!

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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LJW
Honestly, I am not a fan of rhyming poetry, especially rhyming poetry that deals with intense subjects.

I think you could say what you've said here, and have it make more of an impact, without rhyming.

Posted 14 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very emotional. the way you kept saying
"She's looking sick, she's looking frayed
She's looking old, she's looking gray"
Brang the poem to a whole new level.
It really did make it. it flowed through most of it really well.
Great write.


Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow! No suggestions. This hits a chord with me because I'm writing a story about a sentient planet. Like the reveal in the middle. I love when the writer gives life and consciousness to our world and the things around us. Great way to judge humanity from the outside looking in while being trapped inside. What ingrates we are. Good job.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow! This is wonderful and truth spoke, I loved your last stanza.
Well written write here.

Posted 14 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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11 Reviews
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Added on July 31, 2009
Last Updated on October 3, 2009

Author

The Flawed
The Flawed

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About
I am a man who loves writing poetry, and find it the easiest way of expressing how I feel, particularly when I don�t like to talk about these �feelings�. I cannot .. more..

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