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unreachable

unreachable

A Poem by Angel Bird
"

out of inspiration. a kerchief moment

"

 

 

on her wedding day

his heart was breaking

not only in two

but into millions of pieces

and each and every broken piece

was numbing him with unbelievable pain

 

he had known this to become

the darkest day of his existence

it got even darker than dark

today his world stopped turning 

his sun got knocked off

 his whole being ripped in two

 

he looked at her in the distance

standing like an angel from heaven 

in a gleaming cloud of white  

on top of the big steps

at the cathedral's entry

never had he seen such innocent and pure beauty

 

he filled his lungs with a big gulp of fresh air

but it did not help

the terrible hurting inside

nothing could help

this evil spirit, sore thoughts

and all of those way too clear images

that constantly emerged

and which he couldn't get out of his reeling mind

 

that this  ... well ... handsome guy

was to touch 'his' precious love tonight ...

and it will be his  ' R i g h t ' to do so ...!!!  ...DAMN!!!

that guy there with those   b l u e   b l o o d   m a n n e r s !

was to be the father of her future princes and princesses

she was lost to him now - for good! - forever!

 

the just married couple

made its way through an

applauding, shouting, waving and singing crowd

he did not even notice nor realise it

he only saw the one person

who meant everything to him

the one he loved with every fibre of his being

coming nearer and nearer

her slender and fragile figure

on the arm of that ... m a n !

 

right then he caught

her furtive glance at him

and he saw a lonely tear

gliding down her lovely peachy cheek

 

they both knew

it was the end

of it all

the end

of the two of them

the end

of two

who were meant to be

.......... but could never be

 

even when his whole heart

was hers - forever

and hers was his - forever

 

W H Y ???

 

 

why had she

to be

 

the King's daughter

 

?!?!?

 

 

© 2014 Angel Bird


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Featured Review

Well done! It was a wonderous read, and attention grabbing too. I applaud your piece. It was far too easy to slip into the mind of the narrorator. The only thing, I feel was missing was the raging anger and of being forced to let another touch the one who holds his heart. The anguish and helpless feelings were easily portrayed. Truely a fine piece!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Angel Bird

10 Years Ago

Thank you very much for your kind review. Yes maybe his desperate anger could be a little bit more r.. read more



Reviews

You did very well with this, I enjoyed it! The only I suggest would be to work on your grammar a but. It doesn't need much work, but it is a little rocky. If you patch it up a bit it will make the poem a little easier to read. But aside from that, I liked the concept of the poem, you handled the character's feelings very well!

-Howl

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Awww that was sad, but good. I liked it.

Posted 14 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thanks for your submission from my contest back from the Lost Island :) This was really good, and I liked the descripition of his feelings of being married to her (and not even wanting to even if he could) It seemed as if he didn't want to waste her time, but couldn't stop it.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thanks for your submission in my contest! I enjoyed reading this. It had a very unique twist to it. Nice Job.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thank you, a bunch, for entering your poem into my contest. I must say there were many things in this read I wasn't expecting, in a good way. Excellent writing. Makes me want to share it.
You have a very good chance.

Best of luck.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very nice, rather surprising at the end.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

thanks for the submission into my contest, enjoyable read!

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thank you for entering my contest!
I've been spending some time reading some of your other work just trying to get to know your style!



Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

interesting, but for some reason it didn't grip me.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Interesting read. One thing I'd change:

"was numbing him with unbelievable pain"

this one didn't really make sense to me. It seems to me if it was numbing him, he wouldn't feel any "unbelievable pain". It doesn't work for me. However, it can be easily fixed, if you so wish.

Posted 15 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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Shelved in 5 Libraries
Added on April 30, 2008
Last Updated on February 24, 2014

Author

Angel Bird
Angel Bird

About
---While my pen tries to save the impossible, the truth is seeping through the ink... © 2010 Angel Bird --- No wall however thick will prevent my imaginati.. more..

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