Him//

Writing this for English assignment. only took me 15 mins but just want to know if it's any good

The only one who can tell my loving sighs from my tired ones. 

He can carry me above the skies without lifting a finger -only a pinch of a smile- and travel the empty air until my eyes become heavy with exhaustion and mind fulfilled with adventure. 

The only one who knows to hold my soul firmly but my body gently.

I love him more than a blackout in the winter, when candles fill the house with such calm beauty and complete serenity. 

I love him more than wearing new bathers by the pool in summer, absorbing every sun drop, scent and sound.

I say the words over and over "I love you, I love you, I love you", hoping its already significant meaning will become forever eternal. 

I say the words over and over "I love you, I love you, I love you" as it stabs me in the chest, where hope lies, like a soldier with a sword because it kills me not to hear you return such love

Author's Note

Any feedback is appreciated! Happy to look at your work too :)

Reviews

[Muse]

Some advice, if you want people to review you. Perhaps try reviewing them first. Just a suggestion from an old-timer here on the cafe.

Your writing is "good"

I would not consider it a poem, but instead a ramble of thoughts. If you are trying to declare the message of a person who is heads over heals in love. Well then, mission accomplished.

[Anonymous111]

Thankyou!! I'll be sure to have a good look around and write some reviews then :) I'm not too sure what the aim of this piece of writing was but I just wanted something to be felt I guess. Thanks so much! Xx

[Muse]

You are welcome