Feelings

Feelings can be so messed up

So yesterday you made me cry, did you? Well maybe the fault's all mine
I feel like a hundred different feelings all at once
And the last negative thought i would expect was yours
But you don't understand what i'm going through
I'm tired and stressed, explaining it to you
I just want you to make me smile, not try to say who's right.
Because when i woke this cold morning, my thought wasn't to start a fight
Wish you could get that, wish you could understand
There's so much happening in my head, and i just want to stand.
But Instead of giving me your hand and trying to hold me up.
Instead your words are the hardest blows and i feel i should be done.
Just let you go, but i need you though, i can't believe this is me.
My head is aching from all the crying, but i doubt you even see.
This is not us, let's go back to when, "we" used to make me smile.
But for today i just want to push back the thoughts of you, and maybe rest a while.

Reviews

[pia]

this is a beautiful poem about a person feeling low and hurt and deceived by someone they loved
i feel the emotion and pain. you did an incredible job passing on those feelings to the reader
if you don't mind a few critiques.
i'd suggest reading your sentences again and smoothing out a few lines. they kinda interfere with the flow to make awkward sentences. but just a few lines not many.
in line 7: first of all, id suggest using the word 'cause' or 'because' not 'coz' that's slang and informal
also sentence should be 'Cause when i woke up in this cold morning....'
line 10: '...........and trying to hold me up'
apart from this
you write beautifully and this was a wonderful read full of emotions and a good writer always knows how to show those emotions through words.
i hope to read more of your stuff
ill be happy to
keep writing !!

[Avia]

Thanks so much for the critique. I'm really glad you like it.

[pia]

I love your works !!!
Keep practicing and you'll be even more amazing

[Avia]

Thank you so much😊

[pia]

need any help or motivation !!! here to help :)

[Avia]

I would really like that. I love your works too.

[Kim Stegeman]

OMG this is reallygood. really really good

[Avia]

Thank you☺. Really appreciate the review

[Najam Us Saher]

It's really hard to express your pain and even more harder to keep yourself together when you write, you managed to do that very well.

[Avia]

Thanks so much. I just needed to write that to feel better.

[Najam Us Saher]

I can understand, remember what I told you.
You're always welcome.

[Avia]

Yes, i remember. :)