Dreaming of great escapes

Dreaming of great escapes

A Poem by Beccy

Watching rainbows, wondering where they go;
making footprints in the early morning snow,
that melts away beneath the sun's pale call,
leaving no trace, no trace at all.

Counted moments, heartbeats slipping by,
time measured by the stars on high; 
that like each little child must fall, 
leaving no trace, no trace at all.

Yet still for now, the children play,
so happy in their blissful ways;
sailing boats and running races,
slip't of humdrum adult traces,
that come the day will quietly steal
the magic from a world beyond
the office and the factory floor;

And all the laughter in the world is theirs,
they have no burdens, no deep cares,
no apron strings, nor wage to earn,
or moments lost, forever yearned; 
instead, barefoot they dance 
beneath the fleeting sun,
unmindful that such sweet 
escape will all too soon be done.

© 2017 Beccy



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Reviews

I liked the poem. The great escape. The dream for the most of us.
"And all the laughter in the world is theirs,
they have no burdens, no deep cares,
no apron strings, nor wage to earn,
or moments lost, forever yearned;
instead, barefoot they dance
beneath the fleeting sun,
unmindful that such sweet
escape will soon be done."
The above lines could stand alone. Barefoot and dance. Just need the sea and the great escape. Thank you Beccy for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 1 Year Ago


Sweet one, lovely choice of words. You brought them together in a smooth and nicely reading. I especially like the repetition of the line "leaving no trace, no trace at all", it strengthens your words and what lies behind them in awell crafted way.

Posted 1 Year Ago


Really strong poem. I do miss my younger days when my brothers and I use to build clay dams in the ditches and wake up the next morning to find them gone with the night rain. We never understood the force of nature that young. But now I find that my childhood was and is different from my kids; Ipads and whatnot.
The rhyme scheme is great, the wordplay is fantastic, but it's nothing compared to the emotion it invokes. Which is I guess the whole point, right? Don't wait so long to write another one. CD

Posted 1 Year Ago


Great wording and wonderful rhyming... we must live our youth to the fullest because once we come of age it becomes hard to find time for carefree moments.

Posted 1 Year Ago


i know of one little boy who will grow up knowing about the gift of words and the magic they can perform, a boy whose childhood it protected and honored

Posted 1 Year Ago


Thank you Lydia. Perhaps a little dismal, but I do take comfort in the fact that there will always be the laughter of children.

Posted 1 Year Ago


The innocence of children....how quickly life strips it away. I liked the repetition of "leaving no trace, no trace at all." A bit of a dismal view, but very well written, Beccy. Lydi**

Posted 1 Year Ago



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Added on May 31, 2016
Last Updated on January 27, 2017

Author

Beccy
Beccy

Northampton, Northamptonshire, United Kingdom



About
I'm forty, single and have a lovely eleven year old son called Charlie. I've been writing poetry and short stories since I can remember. I had never really been inclined to share my writing until a sh.. more..

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