They Came By Sea

Just a little something

Mist clung to the sea, shifting and rolling with the waves and the wind. In this mist sailed the man known only as Fjell. He stood at the prow of his vessel, Myrkur, strands of hair fluttering in the breeze. Startling green eyes glowered from a face that, once considered handsome, had been rendered fearsome by sun and salt and sword. Before him stood a crowd of thirty-three warriors, dressed for battle. Thunder growled somewhere in the distance, Thor waging war against his anvil, but Fjell paid it no heed; he had his own war to fight. 

"Each man on this boat has sacrificed much to find his way here," Fjell's voice, deep and laced with easy authority, carried clearly through the wind. "You have left wives, and children, hearth and home, to fight with me, and to return to your families richer than you left. That is a noble dream, a Viking dream, and these English horor seek to keep you from realising that dream! Tell me, brothers, you who have sailed across open seas and have shown no fear in the face of death, you who have slain kings and laid waste to nations, shall we let them?" 

A resounding roar answered Fjell's question, pride for the men he led breathing new fire into his heart and raising the hairs on the back of his neck. He had sailed with these men across ocean and fjord, and he knew he could trust each man to the very end. They were Brudsikker - Unbreakable - and whether in the raging fires of battle or the sudden tempests of the sea, each man held the life of his brother above his own. A familiar sound shook Fjell from his momentary reverie: the snap of bowstrings, and the gentle hiss of arrows scything through the air. It had begun.

Author's Note

Vikings are badass, so I wrote a little something that, with time and a miracle, I might be able to turn into something longer.

Fjell is Icelandic for 'mountain', Myrkur is Icelandic for 'darkness', and horor is Swedish for 'whores'.

Reviews

[barleygirl]

This is an unusual genre for my typical reading tastes & despite this, the beginning of your story reads as easily as any story of a more popular genre. You've included many vivid descriptions (great opening line). The setting, characters, & intent are revealed at a good pace & with clarity (these types of stories are often cryptic to me). Foreign words are introduced well & defined in author's notes, so we aren't struggling thru any language barrier. Great beginning, keep going!

First paragraph: "warriors dressed for war" (how about "battle" instead of war?)

[Ben Barton]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it.

Definitely changing that line - thought I'd edited it before I'd finalised it, but clearly not!

[Wicahpi]

hi Mr. Barton. Thank you for sharing this short story in the "What Floats Your Boat" contest. Definitely a story worthy of more! I appreciate learning new words/languages and you included vocabulary that was intriguing to me. Thank you for including the definitions in your author's notes so that I could gain more understanding. Sometimes I find this genre a bit too bloody for my tastes, but the camaraderie between these men must definitely be commended. You write with ease; for it was easy to read and understand with vibrant imagery to keep me, the reader, engrossed in the story. Fine job!

[Tinman07]

I recently read 'The Last Kingdom' by Bernard Cornwell which was set in the Saxon/Dane era of British history. This piece brought back much of the mood of those tales of battle.
The pride and camaraderie of brothers-in-arms comes across well, as does the 'ordinary soldier' with families waiting... a tricky balance you covered neatly.

[Ben Barton]

I love Bernard Cornwell! Thank you for your kind words.

[Ember Smyth]

I enjoyed this story very much. Nice use of the Icelandic and Swedish as well. :)

[Ben Barton]

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this, and thanks for the kind words! I had a lot of fun writing it, so I'm glad you enjoyed it.