My Crumbling Mask

A mans carefully wrought facade begins to crumble, exposing his true self.

My Mask is beginning to crumble, exposing the truth beneath,

I can feel the cracks appear as if I stare into the broken mirror

The facade I have carefully maintained losing all its coherency.

Anxiety courses through my being, terrified by how people will

finally react to who I truly am, finally seeing my true self.

I hide behind my crumbling mask like an actor,

Never revealing my emotional state to anyone,

Neither friend nor family nor even to myself.

No one can know who I am for fear of hatred,

For fear of being exposed like an open wound.

Pieces are falling off, breaking like fine porcelain.

But it dawns on me that I can never mend this mask that I don,

The blood seeping throughout, the scars open for all to witness,

And I can never cover my face with the hands I have neglected.

It is too late to repair that which has long been breaking,

And I have to wonder, after all these years of deception...

Who am I?

Author's Note

Just read it and let me know what you think. Alessander unintentionally gave me the inspiration for this poem. Thanks Alessander. ;)

Reviews

[Lord of mad men]

This was a extremely pleasing read. I enjoyed it very much but I am in a state very similar to what you have depicted in this so my review is not the best but I wanted to express some form of respect and try to let you know this is very good. It speaks very deeply​ to me. My mask is not breaking and it's not coming off any time soon. Even those closest to me only know what I have all them to know. We all have a mask to wear we just choose weather to wear it or not. We choose if we define it or it defines us. Under the mask I wear I am changing for I do not yet Know who I am. Thank you very much for publishing this. Yours truly a mad Lord.

[Lovecraft]

Thank you. My mask/facade has some cracks in it but it has yet to crumble.

[Lord of mad men]

We always fear what others think but we fear what we think the most. Our own thoughts are what scares is the most. When the mask does crumble do not try​ to stop it. Remember there are those who only know the mask some might fear change but those people are who have kept the mask on. Be yourself or more then this mask may not be the only thing that crumbles in front of your very eyes.

[Farhan Shaikh]

Man,it's just amazing..quite emotional as well..I really like it..very good write..

[Lovecraft]

Thank you, Farhan. :)

[Casey Lou]

Very relatable and well written. And, for me, quite emotional.
More people than you'd think wear a mask every day, and suddenly realise that they can't take it off, and who they have professed to be to everybody else, becomes who they are. It can be an immense inner battle.
I loved this, well done. :)

[Lovecraft]

Thanks. I enjoyed your thoughts on the concept. :)

[Harley Quinn]

I love it! You are very talented.

[Lovecraft]

Thank you very much, Erica! ;)

[MsJewel]

This is great work. I could feel the emotion in your words...and the last line...perfection. Julie

[Lovecraft]

Thank you very much, Julie! :)

I have to admit that throughout much of my life I've worn this mask, fearful of people discovering how I really feel and how different I truly am from the average person. But I am now proud to be different, a unique and odd individual.

I am who I am. ;)

[Ana Papaya]

i think it is easily relatable, it takes looking into a mirror to spot those cracks and once we become aware the pace at which it crumbles increases but this poem makes me believe that it is more of a shedding of skin, like a snake, and another will be worn for a while, until the next shedding, and so on and so forth because in life we do become different people at each life stage. and that there, dexter, is my two cents. don't kill me for it, please.

[Lovecraft]

Thank you for your enjoyable review. Don't worry, I only kill those whom kill the innocent. ;)

[Ana Papaya]

:) i should be ok then

[David R Gonzalez]

this is an excellent piece of work. It has a mysterious tone throughout each verse. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it especially the ending.

[Lovecraft]

Thanks, David. I enjoyed writing this piece.

[Hebe]

You have managed to express so many levels in this piece, the psychology of wearing the mask the fear, and the ending just pulls it all together....can the real person please stand up ! Absolutely loved it, amazing piece!

[Lovecraft]

Thank you, that was mainly what I was attempting to express. We all wear metaphorical masks at one time or another for many different reasons.

[SamSim27]

This is really good.
The last line was very poignant for me. Its a question i'm sure everyone asks themselves. And a question we should all ask ourselves.
Very enjoyable read.

[Lovecraft]

Thanks, Sam! :)

This was partly inspired by dialogue in the book American Psycho, lol.

[SamSim27]

I can't say I've read it.
It may need to be added to my ever growing list of books to read.

[Lovecraft]

Just bear in mind it's a masterpiece but it is extremely violent and disturbingly grotesque and sick in so many ways. Still, if you have a strong stomach you must read it. ;)

I'd suggest you look it up online before you read it though.

[FIN]

The ending question, "Who am I?" made this a worthwhile piece for me to read. Most people wear masks and that last statement of finally coming to the conclusion of not knowing who one is because of such (and the fear behind that) tied this whole piece together, re-invoking the state of fear spoken upon throughout.

I enjoyed it; mostly because of the philosophical and psychological nature of the poem.

Much love,

LR

[Lovecraft]

Thank you very much, LR! :)

I like the idea of someone wearing this mask for so long that when it finally comes apart they don't quite know who they really are.

[Lovecraft]

And I do aim to please... :D

[aLittlePain]

Are you an Eliot fan? There's a hint of him here. Masks are everyday wear for most of us, though things can become foggy after a time...very nicely crafted piece....smart! R xo

[Lovecraft]

Bret Easton Ellis? Yes, I am. Less Than Zero is great and American Psycho is his magnum opus. This was inspired by a line in American Psycho. ;)

Thanks!

[aLittlePain]

I meant T S Eliot :) but I can certainly see how you drew inspiration from American Psycho, a polarising read.

[Lovecraft]

lol, oh, I misread the name. :(
In American Psycho there is a line where Patrick Bateman says "My mask is slipping" or something like that.

[aLittlePain]

Haha...it's cool, but when you mentioned American Psycho I thought of Bateman 'I think my mask of sanity is about to slip'

Your poem went from cool to dope upon this realisation!

[Lovecraft]

Lol, thanks. That was the line I was paraphrasing.

I did enjoy T.S. Elliot's The Waste Land though.