Decision

Decision

A Story by 0_o Abbie
"

Yeah idk. It just happened.

"
A girl sits alone on her bathroom floor. Her parents scream at each other outside the door. She shuts them out. She's heard it all before. Nothing ever changes. She needs to escape. She needs to let some of the anger and the pain out. She looks at her perfect wrist. She runs her fingers along the visible veins under her pale skin. She opens her palm. Inside lays a razor. She feels tears fill her eyes. She blinks them away. She stares hard at her wrist. Her skin is perfect. Untouched. A thin veil to the the veins she knows lay underneath. She twisted the razor between her first finger and her thumb. A loud band signals her father has started with the evening violence. Her mother screams. She closes her eyes. She closes her ears to the noise like she does every night. Her heart skips a beat and she put the razor into her skin. Do it. Do it. Just do it! She screams at herself. But she can't. She lets tears fall from her eyes. Weakling. Just like dad said. She throws the razor in anger and curls up on the floor sobbing. Waiting for the violence outside the bathroom door to end.

-- Next Morning

She opened her eyes and sat up suddenly. She looked around and cursed. She'd spent the night in the bathroom. She stood stiffly and moaned. She griped the sink, her head was spinning. She hung her head and waited for it to pass. She looked into the mirror, God. You look horrible. She told herself. Her pale skin seemed more pale than ever, her light hair framing her face in a frizz. She looked away, taking a deep breath, preparing herself for the torture that lays outside the door. She opened the door and slipped out. She saw the pieces of a beer bottle at her feet, she neatly side stepped them. She tip-toed to her room.

"Holly. Honey is that you?"

She stopped and her fist clenched, seemingly of their own accord. "What mom?"

"Hun can you do me a favor and grab me that bottle out of the fridge?" Her mother's voice was weak and drunken.

Holly shook her head and forced her hands open. Without speaking she walked a couple feet into the "kitchen" opened the fridge and grabbed the "water" bottle that she knows isn't filled with water. She walked slowly and defiantly to her mother and handed her the bottle. She looks down at her pathetic excuse for a mom, resting in their "living room" on the floor leaning up against a wall. Holly's dad sold all the furniture a month ago to pay the bills. Or for the alcohol. Holly really didn't care which. "Here." She said menace in her voice.

Her mom smiled weakly and took the bottle. Holly walked away before she saw her mom open the bottle and drink from it. Holly went into her room and grabbed her clock to figure out the time. 6:00 am. Wonderful. She had 30 minutes to get ready and get to the bus. Holly felt the anger build inside her.

-- 35 Minutes later.

Holly raced down the street trying to get to the corner before the bus left. She could see the bus and the line of kids boarding the it. "Wait!" She called as the last kid started to get on the bus. He turned, then nodded. He said something into the bus that Holly didn't hear. Holly quickened her pace. Finally she reached the bus, breathing harder in the frigged air. The kid started up the steps. "Thanks." She mumbled.

"No problem." He answered. Not bothering to look back at her.

She looked up slightly to get a look at his face, failing and seeing only his green hoodie. His voice was surprisingly deep. She just shook her head and ignored the grin forming at her lips. She got to the aisle and looked for a seat, the bus was packed. The guy had taken a seat on the only open bench. Holly shrugged and walked to the bench and sat beside him.

He looked over at her in a slight surprise then smiled and said. "John." He offered his hand, and she took it.

"Holly." She smiled back. "Thanks for holding the bus."

He shrugged. "No worries." Then with a slight grin he said. "But you owe me one."

Holly shook her head to hide the grin forming on her face. "Sure thing."

He turned and looked out the window.

-- That Same Day.

Holly sat alone at lunch, pushing her food around on her plate. Her appetite seemingly gone. More to her mood than that she didn't know what was on her plate. Something meat-like.

"Hey. Room for another?"

Holly looked up to see John, tray in hand, standing next to her. She nodded. "Sure."

He sat. "So, why were you late this morning?" He asked, trying to start a conversation.

Holly thought about the question, the truth would be 'My parents were fighting so I slept in the bathroom and didn't hear my alarm go off. Then this morning I got yelled at for god knows what. And I had to get my mom another bottle or 'water', clean up the broken beer bottle and be told I'm worthless multiple times. ' Instead she simply said, "Overslept."

He nodded. "I hate that."

Holly almost rolled her eyes. Like he had the right to hate anything in his perfect little life. "Yeah, it sucks." She turned back to her food and began pushing it around again.

"You know what else I hate?" He said swallowing a bite of whatever it was on their plates.

"What?"

"When people lie to you about why they were late for the bus."

She looked up. He was hiding a grin. She narrowed her eyes. "uh-huh."

He nodded. "That sucks. Especially when you take the time to talk to the girl and all."

Holly stared up at him. "right. Yeah I totally understand."

"So are you gonna tell me or what?"

"Or what." She replied looking back to her food. He was funny.

"Okay." He said accepting her answer. "So what's your favorite color?"

Holly thought. It'd been years since she last answered that question. "Green."

"Cool. Mine's red. What's your favorite animal?" He asked monotone.

Holly looked at him. "Why?"

He shrugged. "I'm bored."

She shook her head and snorted. "Fish."

"Really fish? That's the best you can do?"

She shrugged. "Okay... Piranha." She lied. "Better?"

He nodded. Then went back to his food. Then he looked up and said "You know, you're a really bad liar."

-- 2 Weeks Later

Holly sat in the bathroom again. There was yelling again. These things were becoming a habit. Her father would start hitting, her mother would start drinking and they'd both start yelling. Then she'd escape to the bathroom, blocking out their screeching. She felt tears in her eyes as her father screamed her name. He was banging on the door. Screaming at her unintelligibly. She looked at the razor in her hand. Tears filled her eyes. What would John think? She shook her head. I don't care what John thinks! Yes you do! She scoffed at herself. You were all too pleased when he sat with you at lunch! No I wasn't! She screamed back. Then as if to prove it she slid the razor across her wrist. She gasped and stifled a whimper by biting her lip. She whimpered not from the pain but disbelief she'd actually done it. She set the razor down and curled up on the floor. Crying all the more. Disappointed with herself.

-- The Next Morning

Holly sat next to John on the bus. Talking and laughing. Holly's laugh was just a show. The only thing occupying her mind was the forming scar on her wrist. She felt guilty and stupid. What a loser. She thought as she laughed at one of John's jokes.

Suddenly he pointed across her out the window. "Hey look!"

His sweatshirt sleeve coming up slightly, as he did so. She didn't look where he was pointing. Just starred at his wrist. She took his hand and pulled his sleeve back. "Did you do that?"

He jerked his arm back and was silent for several minutes. Then seemingly embarrassed he said. "That was a long time ago. I don't do that anymore."

Holly put a hand to her own wrist and looked down. She felt guilty. She felt like she'd intruded on his privacy. She felt she had to make up for it, or maybe she just wanted someone to know. Maybe she wanted help... Maybe. She pulled up her sleeve and un-knotted the bandanna she'd tied over the cut to hide it. She turned her arm up and looked out the window. But she wasn't really seeing. Just starring.

"When?" He asked taking her hand and pulling up her sleeve farther.

Holly was silent. "Last night."

"Why?" John said his finger gently touching the cut.

She took a shaky breath. "I don't wanna talk about it."

"Hey listen. It's okay. The only way you'll get over this without going to the hospital is by talking. Talk to me. I'm safe. I promise. I won't tell anyone." He said. His voice was soft. Caring. His voice sounded safe.

Holly just shook her head. "I can't. I just... It's stupid."

John laced his fingers threw hers and quietly said. "Look at me."

She turned to face him. She liked his hand holding hers. It made her feel safe. Secure.

"You can tell me. I won't ever hurt you." He said his eyes holding hers.

She felt tears well up and she leaned closer to him so only he could hear. "Promise?" She asked.

He nodded. "I promise."

"It's stupid like I said." She began. "My parents just yell alot. My dad gets mad and my mom gets drunk. I can't take the screaming anymore. I just can't do it." She said, a tear spilling out of her eye.

He nodded and wiped the tear from her face. "I know. It's hard. But I care about you. I'll always be here if you want to talk, or even if you just want to cry."

She smiled as another tear streaked her pale cheek. Just knowing someone knew, and someone cared was enough. She leaned into him and layed her head on his shoulder. He tilted his head resting it on hers.



© 2011 0_o Abbie


Author's Note

0_o Abbie
Yup... :D

Any and all criticism welcome. :D

My Review

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Reviews

Really good :) I rly liked it!! nothing rly to say (bad) about it.

Posted 12 Years Ago


dialog is solid. so is the character development. not much to criticize on, such its really well worded and structured great. 100/100 for sure.

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on March 31, 2011
Last Updated on April 7, 2011

Author

0_o Abbie
0_o Abbie

TX



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