I'm So Poetic! (pt. One?)

An ode to all of my writer's cafe friends and some of my favorite poetry.

" Cause you don't understand him, it don't mean that he's nice. It just means that you don't understand all the bullshit that he writes!"

                                      Jay-Z, "Blueprint 2"

 

 

 

 

I'm so Poetic!

By Brjden "PickingOnWillHunting'sFriendAtABar" Crewe

 

 

If you practice, you couldn't reenact this

The honest fact is, I'm just good at this

I use big words & take you to the depths of my sea

With one set of scuba gear conveniently 

As the poem gets too deep

 

A wise man told me "sleep is the cousin of death"

So I feed Mr. Sandman Starbucks coffee

And 'No Doze' mixed with crystal meth

 

I'm WalkingBlind as I floRide with BrownSuga at my side

Then I catch a train northbound smoking

the DutchessPoet as I hide

Like a poetic Refuge

I say "God Bless You" to false Idols

And dismiss them like Ryan Seacrest do

The Object or should I say objective is to

Spend a Winter-like McPherson

In the depths of a QuietPoet's prison

Welcome to my own personal jail

As I Rock and Roll with my Cowboy hat

Because I'm a little country as well

I wanna reach everyone even in Heaven and in Hell

All races, creeds and disfunctions

My poetry's even avail.......ABLE

In both sign language and braile

But Bridgey's sold separately and not included

I belong to Passion's disposable usage,

but my Mentality's for Sale

As I sail off the coast of a Phantom Heart I sniff something that smells Like Poison,

so I'm avoiding the Bride's Maid & Vail

I am Brjden Crewe all Alien's Hail

I break rules and mix Oil & Water

 but that's Me(In A Nutshell), oh well

 

I Have a Death Wish that Sets Me Ablaze

With the Rage of a Heart Retired

That inspires desperate art

but It's Alright so I say Farewell Wretched Heart

I am the Mis-Education of the Love-Her

I'm what happens when the Peoples G Riot

& sets fire to bras and snug shirts!

 

Women go all Dara(Dramatic) on me, but still I live to be

The Love Doctor Crewe At Birth as a Dead Memory

See, The Evolution of Eve brings Intensity

that the world wasn't prepared for

We Didn't See That Coming as men

She Was Just Too Much Science For Me

She Didn't Know Love, because she

didn't know herself apparently

No truer words have been Spoken, that's why

the Nazis Got Nothin' On Me

 

My s**t is Sheer Poetry and Karma is a M**********r

so I travel back in time to kidnap

my mother & her virginity at age twenty three

If the Sphinx was a Lady

then maybe we wouldn't need The Truth:

This is Why I Hate Poets

because femininity is a liability in the vocal booth,

Or So They Say

 

I praise your Woman-Like Ways and tendencies

But still, Fear Corrupts so Go Ahead and Rape Me

I'm a Wordsmith, Shape Shifter

trapped in a Love Monsoon

which I fight with a hurricane

I fight fire with fire and for 29 years,

I Break Even doing the same damn thang

 

See, I wanna be More Than Nobody's Sweetheart

This is Why I Have Panic Attacks

But I come back like the Energizer Bunny recharged

 I Loved Once, I Remember

and lived A True Story for a week

With Super Powers and an Inner Mic

listening as Denial Speaks

 

But I Survive like Gloria Gayner

and use Whatever It Takes

To be the best Artist I Can Be

in the wake of a sound sleep

My Legion of doom is What Holds the Truth

like Nik'aule is the Queen of Sheeba

So Insignificant Me is relaxing with

God & The Devil & Shots of Tequila

I may be a Soldier's Poem,

Looking Down on the World

And I Pity Them & their Inexistence,

Breathing Spring that's Intoxicating

to the little boys & big girls

 

See when my Real Eye Realize Real Lies

I pray to Christ or whoever's on duty, for a second chance

But it's A Little Late now, so now

I'm critically conditioned as the Artist in the Ambulance

See Here's what I have to Say......

The Language of My Imagination

is a Priceless Treasure

To behold in the oldest of times and in the Coldest of Weather

 

as A Matter of Understanding,

I can't stand poets that write like this!

They spew super big words and intellectual nonsense

And I Hate Poems About Writing Poetry

They give you more than you can possible handle

But I still Lyrical Love you all, so as I leave

I'll Blow Out the Candle..............

 

Oh God, I think It's to be continued...........

Author's Note

I really don't like most poets. I don't understand them. Either I'm too stupid, or they're poetic for the sake of sounding intelligently poetic. So while making fun, I included some of my favorite people here, and their poetry. I left a lot out, so I'll do this again soon........

Reviews

[Fear Corrupts!]

Lmao.
Wow, you've really done it now - what did you do, write out a list of the name's of all your favourite poets in order to incorporate them all into this long- a*s/kick-a*s poem?
Haha, you're certainly creative, I'll give you that.
Man, how did you think of doing this?
Haha, you managed to get your message across with the help of all of our poem titles and display names;
that must of took you quite a while.
:)

Thumbs up from :

{ Fear Corrupts! }

P.S. You are officially in my top 3 list of favourite writers.
What do you think abou' tha?

[Spoken]

No truer words have been Spoken, that's why

the Nazis Got Nothin' On Me


AHA! {jumps up} hell ya mister! My favorite lines right there.. lol

This was so intellegent and mind blowing how you worked and weaved all these writers within your words... you are IT my friend!

[hgfhfghf]

Wow, haha I love it. Half way threw i almost thought you were serious with all the titles throughout the poem.
I can't really stand people who write their poetry with huge un-understandable words like their some hot shot. Even though i write a lot of 'poetry' atleast i know what the heck i'm talking about.
:]

Peace,
Allison

[Christina Braceros]

hahahaha i noticed a few of my titles...hehehehehe beautiful absolutely amazing i snap and clap and yelll in applause!!!!!!

[poetic soul]

wow....this is really very very cool.......the concept, the flow, the creativity, all is at its best.....i m glad i read this........classically amazing!!

:) Smiles,
Poetic Soul

[Shellie]

This is really cool!! You said alot and I admire the way you said it, and the inclusion of your friends names etc wasn't forced either. Very smooth.

[Collette]

I'm really speechless with this one...WAY COOL concept, and an awesome way to pay tribute to some of your friends on the site. Clever word weaving skills, my friend. I might have to borrow the concept, if you're obliging. Otherwise, I'll leave the baby to its master. ;) snap snap!

[Winter McPherson]

OH MY GOSH!!!!!!! So sweet! You're amazing! (A man after my own heart!)

Thank you so much for the honor. Very creative and endearing write! Excellent!

[~angelalala~]

wow, this must have taken an amazing amount of time & energy to incorporate all these names of poets & names of certain poems into this mesh of work which actually flows well & makes a lot of sense. & yet you 'can't stand poets that write like this!' ? there are all types of poets & poetry. you have your own technique & style & your talented at what you do. i have some bad news for you, Bridge, YOU ARE A POET. welcome to our world. overall, whether you like me or not, or whether you like this review or not, i give this piece of work a 100. i, for one, am impressed. i couldn't have done it.

[Walkingblind]

Awwww! isn't this sweet I should smack the junk mess out you, your not dumb just need
mental help is all. Man this is a mammoth I ate it slow, I like how you were actually saying
something as you included our wc names and poems titles in there. I mean I like the meaning
as well as the shout outs to all the ones who are just too poetic for you....whateva leave me and
my big words alone! Nice and not as colorful as your others no blue words this time I see....I was
a bit surprised. Great poem Bridgey great I love it!