Mommy

Mommy

A Poem by brittanyjane

Mommy, I need you

I cry for you every night

Sometimes I wonder why I wasn't good enough

Sometimes I know you love me, you do.

...don't you mommy?

 

Mommy, I want you

I want to put my arms around you.

Sometimes I think it'd be easier if you were dead

Maybe then I'd have a reason, I'd know why you never come to see me

 

Mommy, I miss you

I have a new mommy now but it's not the same

Sometimes she hugs me and I close my eyes

Hoping that when they open, you'll be there

You do miss your baby, too, right?

 

Mommy, I love you

I know you haven't been around a lot but

Sometimes I wish the last eight years were a silly nightmare and

Sometimes I pretend I don't know your love is conditional.

 

Mommy, I hate you

I hate you, mommy

Sometimes I hate you so much I wish you were dead

Why was daddy always calling and writing and coming to see me,

But you never did?

 

Mommy, I didn't mean that

I love you mommy, I'm sorry.

I know why you don't love me.

I'm a monster. A clingy, hateful, ugly monster.

I could never hate you.

Sometimes I can't sleep, thinking about you (I love you)

 

Mommy, I can't let you go.

Everyone tells me to, but I really love you.

Sometimes I cut myself for you mommy.

It hurts, but not as much as not seeing you.

I love seeing my blood with you encoded in it

A reminder that you are always with me.

 

Mommy, I can see you

In my dreams at night

Sometimes I wake up crying because I know you won't be there

I dream you'll wake me up and take me to school

and when I get home you'll still be there

 

Mommy, can you hear me?

I scream for you every night

Sometimes I even whisper your name in the wind

So it'll carry my message to you.

I love you, Mommy.

 

Mommy, I don't want you to call.

It hurts worse than not talking to you.

Sometimes I think you only call so you can feel better about yourself

I ache for you, to hear you,

but you just taunt me with ideas and

Impossibilities.

 

Mommy, I'm sorry

but I'm suffering.

You threw me away and you don't want me

Sometimes I just want to die and it's your fault.

I love you but I can't stand the very mention of you, mommy.

I miss you so much it makes me sick.

I bleed for you.

I cry for you.

 

Mommy, why don't you love me like I love you?

 

 


© 2010 brittanyjane



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Reviews

is this a true story?

Posted 8 Years Ago


Sometimes I think it'd be easier if you were dead

Maybe then I'd have a reason, I'd know why you never come to see me



-Wow, this is very heartfelt. It was a nice read-

Posted 8 Years Ago


I think its good, you say why you love her and why you don't. Everything is good, and I like it! Good Job!

Posted 8 Years Ago



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Added on December 17, 2008
Last Updated on April 23, 2010

Author

brittanyjane
brittanyjane

LA



About
I don't know a lot about myself, anymore, so I definitely couldn't tell you anything. more..

Writing