Free Falling

Thank you to Helen for the title!

 

 

Don’t look at me
In that way
As I clabber through
Forestry of green
In your eyes
Watching bursts of sunrays
          Reflected in mine

Let me glide down the valley
On wings of your words
Floating through memories
Of soft lyrical verse
Burnt into my skin

          Branded
               Ruined

The state you have me in
As I gather the roses
Plucking out the thorns
Trying to hide among the
Tall thin blades of grass
          Praying
You won’t decipher
The rumblings of my heart
          Hurt
Still binding the cuts
In darkened rooms cursed.

Don’t look into me
In that way
As I tread across earth
Measuring distance needing
The touch of your mouth
Scorching my imagination
Waiting for

     Nightlight
          Daylight
               Sunlight
                    Starlight

Eternal in my blossom
As you fertilise my life
Exploding magnificently
Taking flight freely
While my eyes shadow
          Dreamily
Filling heavenly pages
Five senses reeling
Reaching up and in
To this abandoned feeling
     Not caring
          Not seeing
The world can pass me by
While I create words
T
U
M
B
L
I
N
G
From my mind

As I clabber out from within you
Smoothing out the worry lines

How is it I have so much sight?
And yet,
When it comes to gazing into you
          I am so blind

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

Forestry of green
In your eyes
Watching bursts of sunrays
Reflected in mine

Let me glide down the valley
On wings of your words
Floating through memories
Of soft lyrical verse
Burnt into my skin

Branded
Ruined

The state you have me in
As I gather the roses
Plucking out the thorns
Trying to hide among the
Tall thin blades of grass
Praying
You wont decipher
The rumblings of my heart

This is the beating heart of this poetic dream in my ever so cornfed opinion. We all have our BBM.s (brilliant Bubo moments) and that one is mine.
You make blindness beautiful. Peace

[Rc R. Vagilidad]

i remembered that i put it on my reading list so i concluded that i havent read it yet, lol.

hmm, agree with all the people here. sorry for the short review frm the usual. ill reread this again and give some thoughts, its nearly 1 am and my jaded eyes are totally free-falling... thanks for sharing this anyways.

[Barry S. Maltese]

It's a funny fact that when you take a shovel and dig a hole it gets deeper and the soil gets richer - when you take your heart and dig into your soul your writing gets deeper, and the results richer and more filled with beauty. . . . You write with such style and feeling, it doesn't surprise me that you have so many fans. Another GREAT piece of poetry.

[Jonny Dollar]

I don't know what to say....fabulous work! Keep it up!

[Amy..... "sing To ..]

I am speechless. "To this abandoned feeling...." T U M B L I N G from my mind.

I'm sure each has their own interpretation but this hits home for me. The true hurt and pain...

Excellent work! Thank you for sharing. You are amazing.

Amy

[Erin Dawn]

mmm...sensual, breathtaking, sultry.

[Adam Greenfield]

Damn. What an amazing way to end a piece! I love that last stanza. It really makes this piece. Great job again, Bubo.Oh! A new title. You know, I really think the one you have works. I'll think about it, though, and get back to you if I come up with something.

[Rain]

Bubo..

I read this, and I float through the words, because of the way you write. But, I am so bad at grasping the deeper meanings, sometimes. I feel like I cheat you by not seeing hidden images. I feel your love, so that is in my favor. I've read other works by you that I felt I truely understood. The last lines save me..

How is it I have so much sight?
And yet,
When it comes to gazing into you
I am so blind

It's odd to me. I "love" reading your work, but sometimes think your writing is above me, or perhaps I need to know you more deeply. I sense the beauty in your writing. I know I am reading an extremely talented writer. Keep sending me your work. I like this piece, but am not sure why. I really feel bad, because the reviewer below says "everyone can understand this piece." I understand it, but I don't think I understand it the way I should..and that's on me, not you. Love you, Rain

[Just Manoosh]

I think everyone can understand this piece, perfectly executed honey. Do you really want to change the title?????? It works perfectly as it is.

How about "The Blinding" or "Its better than a stick in the eye"

Mx

[Alistair Canlin]

Liked the payoff at the end, it was well worth wait.

Two title suggestions: Yours
If only you knew

[The Random Writings Of ..]

I really enjoyed the format on this piece, I really felt tied to the piece in reading this. So much emotion, hurt, anger...... questions unanswered. You leave a lot to my imagination.

How is it I have so much sight?
And yet,
When it comes to gazing into you
I am so blind

this stanza here is a perfect way to end the piece, and again raises question... But how many times have we actually felt this way? I could not have put it in better words. Very exceptional piece. I love it!
Kates