OneB

A Story by Calculus

The Banning of a Regular

In the 35 and Over Room there is a discussion about the discomfort of knowing that without a warning, its members might be banned--relegated to grapple with their loneliness alone. The space is not really a safe space as long as the site moderator can ban you for saying what you really feel, writes a 7-cupper in the room.

The focus in the room at the moment is on a regular--OneB, appearing again for the first time after a long absence from the chat room for the 35 and older crowd hanging out on the 7 Cups of Tea free support site for people suffering from depression, anxiety, bullying, and a whole host of emotional and psychological dispositions. OneB's time spent away from the group chat room and whatever support system she had managed to set up for herself she calls "solitary," like the cells in many prisons where the prisoner troublemakers are placed alone for up to 23 hours a day.

The powers-that-be orchestrated a block out of OneB from the site after she was apparently seen as a threat to order in the 7 Cups World; her involvement in a chat room commotion a day ago was of concern, OneB explains in a recent feed post. It was over a profile picture. Someone was wearing someone's meme. OneB thought it was wrong. She saw it as "an overt intrusion on" an individual's "identity and personality." So she spoke up--to the person who appropriated the meme, to the mods; then she tried the management of 7 Cups, but she was soon banned. If she were watching from the inside of the 7 Cups site, her account screen would have flickered in front of her eyes before displaying an Error Code indicating the closing of her 7 Cups world.

And the opening of another. One where listeners don't appear at the click of a button; and it is not so easy to find a trivia game that you can play in your underwear with strangers from all over the world. It was gone. And what was left--unsafe in its lack of a support system, a sense of nearness to people she felt she belonged to--was solitude.

“Studies have shown that 7 Cups helps people feel connected, valued, and understood,” 7 cups boasts in an email promoting one of the subscription packages it offers. Instead of that story, a very different one is told on one member's feed page.

“I’m left feeling abused by 7cups,” OneB's feed post from that day reads, “I don't mean you guys, the community is always great, if not we wouldn't be here, but I can't trust 7cups to not completely cut me off from all of you, in a law unto themselves.”

As of the writing of this piece, OneB's feed is no longer linkable and one regular says he hasn't recalled seeing OneB's avatar hanging out in the site in a few months.

Perhaps, the quote by Rob Siltanen on one member's page on the site defines her value in this world:

“Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do."

The troublemakers get pushed out of spaces often. Labels of mental illness are sometimes lobbed at them as well. Being banned might happen again to OneB, but whatever irreverant acts she is doing to get pushed out, may be what is needed to create better social worlds--on and off the web.