Murdoc and the Onion Cannon

A Story by ChickenLittle

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Murdoc was laying on a chair at the plastic beach. When he heard a noise behind him only to find Shrek beating people with an onion bazooka. These weren’t just any people, but his band members. Shrek fired an onion at Noodle and looked at Murdoc with murder in his eyes.

2D was screaming bloody murder, and Noodle was yelling out random swears in Japanese, trying to fend off Shrek. Russel had died. Shrek shot another onion at Noodle’s head causing an infinity war death by having Noodle evaporate into pixels into the sky. He kicked 2D to China and looked back at Murdoc again, and smiled with yellow teeth, grabbing an onion from a bag he carried on his back.

Murdoc yelled out “The bath!” And stuck out his tongue.

This just made Shrek angry, he yelled “Donkey, get him!” To which a donkey came soaring out of the sky whistling The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, attempting to kick Murdoc in the head.

Murdoc exploded the donkey’s head with a quick lick.

His brains went flying everywhere, and Shrek caught a piece of his guts, he shoved it in the onion cannon along with a couple onions. He aimed at Murdoc.

A gory bomb exploded at Murdoc’s fricking face, and he evaporated.

Shrek laughed as he walked into the ocean to rejoin his onion brothers, which welcomed him with open arms. The bloody mess is still there to this day...and Shrek will forever be watching from the ocean, waiting with his onion cannon loaded.