Why

A week today i flatlined 3 times in 3 and half hours. I died 3 times that night and I can't figure out why I was spared.

Its been a week since I died,
Not just once,
But 3 times,
The devil took me 3 times,
And God brought me back each time,
And to be honest,
I don't understand why,
So many kids are dying,
Innocent,
Hard working,
Decent folk,
But I was spared,
Please god explain this one to me,
You save a guy,
Who has posion running through my veins,
The guy who broke his girlfriend heart,
The guy who hurt everyone he ever loved,
The guy who choose to ruin countless life's,
By filling their crackpipes
And left a trail of victims behind him,
Im calling you out god,
What where drinking that night,
When you choose me,
And not the kid across the hall,
They say I need help,
But this guy above is on my f*****g nerves,
I was at peace with myself,
And he stole that from me,
So here I sit,
With my heart,
So dead,
And cold,
Trapped with my thoughts,
Can't believe this s**t,
Why me,
What have I ever done to be given another shot,
It feels like I'm stranded on an island,
Cut off from the world,
Just trying to remember what kissing her was like,
But then it hits me,
This is my hell,
Trapped in my own insanity,
Just wishing god would have saved someone worth it,
Not some piece of s**t like me