What would we Brits do without having the weather to talk or moan about, eh? (Article)

What would we Brits do without having the weather to talk or moan about, eh? (Article)

A Story by COLLYMORE
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British weather

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By Stanley Collymore

 

Why do we needlessly keep recognizing the seasons in Britain when in actuality there’s no difference nowadays between any of them? I say this because I can well remember the time when there was a clear distinction, let’s say, between Spring and Winter, but those days, alas, are long gone; and when, pray tell, can you truthfully remember or vividly recall when we all had good old-fashioned pristine, and lots of it, snow on Christmas Day and the rest to every one of us who fortunately and specifically overall was then truly and appropriately called Winter?

 

Instead, our current and so-called winter-weather as well as Winter itself have decidedly morphed into rather poor facsimiles of essentially and quite noticeably what was previously Spring, while Spring itself has confusingly been transformed into a bleak, dreary, dismally snowy white and the facade for a traditionally winter-type scenario where, not uncustomary to see, hail sorts, snow downpours and all manner of icy cold and blustery weather liberally bombards our British landscape with impunity and in the process ridiculously fashioning in the making an Artic type environment that in numerous respects, and for me bar none, is in all truthfulness, markedly less appealing or in any meaningful sense reassuring weather-wise as one could realistically expect to find in Iceland or even Greenland.

 

For all that this climatic disturbance with its attendant and debilitating for me anxiety and infernal annoyance does, is to reinforce the customary and irritating British social custom and culture of incessantly talking at every specified chance or contrived opportunity afforded to them, for most Brits to talk rather garrulously about the bloody weather, whether in standard or as well improvised or intuitively manufactured conversations. Seemingly, the only evident thing in a country, the United Kingdom, where most people either noticeably with a distinct apathetic attitude towards or a perceptible and at best minimalist opinion, or even none, on most things uniformly, when it involves the British weather, nevertheless conspicuously and openly have no reticence in exhibiting their forbearing and more consensual unanimity.

 

Essentially while this is a tongue-in-the cheek article and poem there’s nevertheless more than a grain of salt in relation to the truth and about what I’m saying. And whether one believes that the kinds of unpredictable weather patterns that we’ve been experiencing for some time is as a direct consequence of global warming that itself stems from the inconsiderate and even malicious actions brought about by human activities or are simply the result of a cyclical situation that has been going on for millennia and ever since this inhabited planet we live on and call Earth was created, or is a combination in greater or lesser form of these two things, is for every one of you who is all that bothered to make your own analytical judgement on.

 

Then, of course, there are the speculative suggestions that mankind, who has both been a general benefit as well as an infernal curse to this planet we call home while often quite arrogantly and most conveniently forgetting that there are other species of animals as well as other creatures that live here too and in most cases have been on Earth for far longer than Homo sapiens has been, have embarked on and even managed to utilize insidious means, these elements of human kind obsessed with their ludicrous and delusional notions of superiority coupled with a divine right to rule and control everyone and everything on this planet and just as idiotically feel themselves imbued with an unchallengeable right to the perceived concept of their own exclusivism in all matters, to effectively control the weather and malevolently use it for their own purposes and endeavours, is another bone of contention we apparently have to deal with.

 

Truthfully, I’ve no categorical proof that anything of the sort in respect of the weather is happening, but putting that aside and fully knowledgeable about the kind of people that this human scum are, I personally wouldn’t put anything past them.

 

Suffice to say that whoever does what or nothing at all to the weather there’s nothing that I can personally and on my own do about it nor want to idly speculate about for that matter. For I guess that in being basically a Brit what essentially I want to, and like others prefer to do, and specifically in my case when I’ve nothing better to do, is like all the rest of you, in one way or the other, to culturally moan about it.

 

 

© 2017 COLLYMORE


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Added on October 26, 2017
Last Updated on October 26, 2017
Tags: Life

Author

COLLYMORE
COLLYMORE

Cambridge, Cambridgeshire, United Kingdom



About
Academic, Journalist, Writer. I'm a highly intelligent, articulate and well-educated human being with an intuitive but enterprising sense of responsibility and a strong moral compass that instincti.. more..

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