On Losing a Father

Minutes before you hear the news of your father’s death,

You will be a barricade in your congested apartment.

You will be thinking about the weather; your bills.

You will wish you could remember life,

 when is was composed of such simple things.

You will receive phone calls; your mother; your brother.

When you hear the news of your father’s death,

This will be the first time that your life feels sluggish, slow.

You will feel like a broken cassette tape; a tangled mess.

You will attempt to remember pieces of him,

  But you will be too busy digging your face into the pillow cases.

When you see your father dead, he will look confused.

You wonder if he is still able to wonder.

Able to wonder why you are there, why you are left wondering

Why he never showed up to your High School Graduation.

Why he never responded to your letters.

When you tell your brother this,

He will ask you why you wonder this?

How can you be mad at a dead person?

You will reply to your brother.

Brother, he was already dead to me

But so much more alive now that he is dead.

You wish now that he could miss your future wedding;

The birth of your first child, your first big girl job.

You wish that you didn’t have to miss a ghost.  

You do not want to become a vacant aperture, a ghost.

Reviews

[Lovecraft]

Despite some minor grammatical mistakes and having this whole poem essentially as one verse, you've done a remarkable job here. Some of your word choices are brilliant in execution.

I can partially sympathize as my brother died 8 months ago, I am sincerely sorry for your loss.

All in all, a lovingly written poem that just needs a little editing to become great.

[Arline]

Thanks a lot! I've never taken poetry/non fiction classes so I'm always confused on how to engage in constructing a poem on paper/in reading. I usually write my poems thinking about them in terms of spoken word. Thanks for the advice!

[Lovecraft]

A poem can be nearly anything you want it to be. Life tends to often lack rhyme and reason so why shouldn't poems be the same?

Just recognize that this is a sincere poem and nobody can take that away from you. :)

[wordman]

this is really sad,lost before you lost him,but i`m sure he loved you very much,we can`t be all great fathers