In front Of Them

In front Of Them

A Poem by Cyprian Van Dyke
"

His jaw dropped, her smile picked it back up,

"
His headlights were stars,
That stuck to the ground 
Like the UFO's in Close Encounters.

She stood on the sidewalk,
not too far from him;
Looking like a model on a billboard sign. 

The moon rising to her right
And the sun setting to her left.
But she was more stunning - than even the roses on her dress. 

She was looking at his headlights.
He was looking at her eyes. 
Their peripheral vision was of the sunset and moon-rise. 

He was a nerd with glasses and freckles.
She was a bombshell that had not yet blossomed. 
His jaw dropped, her smile picked it back up - perfect. 

He got out the car and met her at the passenger door. 
She wrapped her arms around him and stood like a necklace in front of him.
She was looking at the moon and he was looking at the sun. 


Now that they were together they could clearly see what was in front of them.  



  

11/7/16 written by Cyprian Van Dyke 
edited on the 8th with the help of https://storywrite.com/shapeshifter 

© 2016 Cyprian Van Dyke



Author's Note

Cyprian Van Dyke
What made reading this poem worthwhile for you??

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Featured Review

What gorgeous imagery, Cyprian. So beautifully done. I've reread it several times in the hopes I'll remember certain phrases as they're so romantic.

"She was looking at the moon and he was looking at the sun." So beautiful.

You managed to capture a small set of photographs with your words, giving us a stunning little story. A huge well done to you, sir!

Posted 11 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Cyprian Van Dyke

11 Months Ago

Thank you, Alice. You put a smile on my face, like always.



Reviews

"she was looking at the moon and he was looking at the sun"
so simple yet so beautifully written *^*

Posted 7 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

7 Months Ago

Thank you very much :)
Beautiful use of description.
"He got out the car and met her at the passenger door.
She wrapped her arms around him and stood like a necklace in front of him.
She was looking at the moon and he was looking at the sun. "
The above lines I loved. Complete poem create visions of beauty and perfect place. Thank you my friend for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote



Posted 8 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

8 Months Ago

Thank you Coyote for your review :)
Coyote Poetry

8 Months Ago

You are welcome.
Oh my God! This is so brilliant and stupendous. The symbolism and metaphors are carving out the picture so perfectly.
"His jaw dropped, her smile picked it back up - perfect. " I smiled when I read this line.

"The moon rising to her right
And the sun setting to her left.
But she was more stunning - than even the roses on her dress. "

This stanza is so vivid and layers of significance. I loved how you have portrayed a small period of time into this magnitude, stretching beyond time. Such a pleasure to read this poem. Thanks for sharing.

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you, very! I smiled reading your review. I'm glad to know you liked my poem!
Interesting twist on love. Nice work.

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you very much! :)
I admire the way you have described the beauty here...
It's creative and symbolically meaningful!
Well captured!:)

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you, Tazeen, very! :)
Cyprian Van Kyke,
This was so cool! Boy meets girl in a really different way but it seems more imaginative and symbolic somehow. Maybe even a dream..............the moonlight, the sunlight? She being caught in his headlights? "He was a nerd with glasses and she a bombshell. What a fun combination. Thank you for writing I really enjoyed it.......................Blessings to you. Kathy

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you, Kathy. I'm glad you liked it. Yes, it was different, it's just the way I like it :)
.. read more
The only thing I didn't like was this line, "She was a bombshell that had not yet blossomed." The cliche of saying "bombsell" took me out of the image you were trying to portray for me. I felt like I loved the way you described things so much, I wanted more. What did this woman smell like? Did she smell like flowers, perfume? What were her eyes like? I felt like if you incorporated more of the senses, you could do more with mentioning her as a billboard sign or a bombshell.

Otherwise, what made it worthwhile for me was the way it was put together. I liked the line, "Like the UFO's in Close Encounters." It gave the setting an out-of-this world type of vibe. The rest of the lines really took me into a surreal picture of this woman. Just like the others, I agree I really loved, "She was looking at the moon and he was looking at the sun." I loved them because of how it aligns with the title. You have placed them in the perfect time to view the ideal light of themselves.

Good job.

Thanks for posting!

- Jazz

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you, Jazz for your delight to read review!

Most of the time I do call to the ot.. read more
beautiful...!
loved readin it......

Posted 9 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

9 Months Ago

Thank you very for saying! :)
It's so simple and elegant, ..... It came to life, like a scene in a movie! Wonderful piece...

Posted 10 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

10 Months Ago

Thank you for your much appreciated review.
So romantic. In front of them is a wonderful future...a great love story.
This is an amazing piece. Kudos!

Posted 10 Months Ago


Cyprian Van Dyke

10 Months Ago

Thank you very much! :)

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Added on November 8, 2016
Last Updated on November 8, 2016
Tags: feeling, awe, love, togetherness, nerd, beautiful

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Cyprian Van Dyke
Cyprian Van Dyke

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