Look What You've Created

Look What You've Created

A Poem by Tasha
"

The mess someone has made someone else become

"
Look what you've created!
a monster,
the devil,
someone who doesn't care about any body else

You've infested her with the
" That's  not my problem syndrome "
you've made her turn against her friends
all because you say you love her,

But you don't love her,
you just want to use her;
and pump her like a cow,
until the milk runs dry
then  you run like a coward

You say you care about her,
but you don't care about anybody
but yourself,
you selfish low life!

Look what you've created,
a lion that can't be tamed,
a Tasmanian devil...
its you that  created her...

But in the end, you're just going to hurt her.


© 2011 Tasha


Author's Note

 Tasha
I read a facebook status about someone who "cares" about their girlfriend but she turned into a monster, and then I wrote this. This is definitely not my best, but I hope you guys like it.

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Featured Review

This is good, but you could tighten it up a bit. Leave the imagery and metaphors to speak for themselves and leave out "but you just don't love her" and "You say you just don't care about her" lines. Keep the stuff about milk, cows and lions and devils. Those are vivid images. Thanks for sharing. Keep working at it :-)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Freakin' OUTSTANDING!!! ♥

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

we can try to place the blame and feel fueled by anger and passion gone wrong; but at the end of our destruction - it is the fingers to point somewhere else are extended to increase our pain...

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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42 Reviews
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Added on June 1, 2011
Last Updated on June 1, 2011

Author

 Tasha
Tasha

NC



About
Hey, I'm 18 years old and I love writing. "To know me is to love me" "Every heart has a beat and mine just skips for you" Wanna know more? Message me I love to make new friends. &heart.. more..

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