I Stand Alone

Standing here,
Looking for a moment into the night sky,
Waiting for flashes of beautiful lights,
Anticipating something that has always been mesmerizing...

An unexpected thunderous blast to my left,
Before I could identify what it was another followed,
As my body flinched from the beautiful flashes above,
As I am looking face to the sky,
Almost deep into the rainbow like colors,
Not only a blast directly above my head,
Rain showers of debree cause my vision to blur as it lands near my eye...

I realize looking up is no longer an option,
I look just ahead,
I tremble not wanting to hear another loud sound,
Through the colorful flashing lights I see the person I stand here for,
Wanting to turn and head toward the two that came with,
To seek shelter from the noises so close they feel as if they were piercing my head,
Trying to avoid the droplets that felt like pellets,
And to escape the feeling of darkness...

I knew I had to stand there for him,
To let him enjoy this day,
The excitement of causing the blast,
The amazement in his face as he sent colors shooting to the sky,
The not a care in the world expression as he waited for the end results...

At this moment,
I look around me,
Knowing I must not appear selfish,
Feeling I am not really,
For this is a moment I so wanted to share with him,
Beside him, Safe in his arms...

Instead, on this day,
I knew I was in the kind of place I have been in many times before,
I found myself thinking the same terrifying thoughts as I have in the past,
Although I was confused as my mind would not stop racing,
There was one thing I knew for sure...

In the beginning things appear one way,
Some where in between a person forgets who they were pretending to be,
In the end .... I Stand Alone!

Author's Note

This was a 4th of July when I was very confused. I had a lot of fun that day and really enjoyed the fireworks but I was not expecting things to go the way they did.