Being the Moon

Is the moon what it seems to be?

The moon is such beautiful, such wonderful thing!

 She is so bright and surreal. Her ethereal glow continue to mesmerize all of us.

 How many of us envy her serene nature! How we wish we could have her subtle and majestic beauty. How we wish we could be the moon.

The moon probably laughs at our foolishness. Everything is beautiful from a distance. But when we get a magnified view of something, our opinion starts to change. The moon knows that better than anyone else.

How she mocks us when we envy her beauty - her beauty! What use is that beauty for the moon?

Covered with blemishes and desolate rocks,created by imperfections , completely forsaken.

How lonely, how reclusive was she! The moon knew  how it was to be friendless,lonesome and deprived.

But no one notices her tears

no one notices her loneliness

People continue to praise her for her pulchritude.

The moon wishes, that for once people might see the real her. She wishes them to see past her seemingly beautiful facade and understand- what it really would be like to be the moon.

Author's Note

This started as a poem and ended as a story. I would love to hear your honest opinion of it.

Reviews

[lightsong]

as the Sun too, the true colour of the Sun is gray, not yellow bright or gold, I had these thoughts You've hauntingly shared with us my dear, and if You think about it, it can be the same to many faces on earth, sometime You are so taken and enchanted by someone from a far, but when You get to know them and get closer to them, this magic fades.

Your sincere emotions makes this piece beautiful and serene, Thank You for sharing Your personal thoughts with us.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you Light for your kind words. It is really appreciated :)

[angel]

I think this is amazing and true. Truly from the heart. Thank you for the comment on my poem. It made my day.

[Elizabeth]

It's my pleasure.... Thank you for your kind words :)

[angel]

You are welcome. I tell it like it is.

[FlatLineBeauty]

This was just so brokenly beautiful. I could really feel the emotion of beneath the surface. You just feel that moment of insecurity and wrap your arms around yourself. You start to feel a million miles away from everyone... Secluded and admired from afar. No one sees the strength it takes to keep shining. xo FLB

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much for your kind words!

[AcasualPawn]

Its good read.,

Well Jupiter has more than 60 moons how will you personify there beauty...

Tough task.. Lol

[Elizabeth]

thank you!

[Deason]

This piece started off very strong, and the meaning is one that drives home to many readers. You seemed a little anxious to reach the turning point of the story, however. Transitioning was already mentioned in another review, and I agree that a little more development would have maintained the flow of the story. Despite this story feeling a little rushed, your style really shines through your imagery and your word choice. I enjoyed this a lot, great work.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much. I am actually working on its revision and I hope I may work out on the transition, without stretching out the story too much.

[angel]

I think it is beautiful and I love the way you made the moon so lonely and yet so beautiful also. I almost cried when I read this. Thank you also for my comment you gave to me.

[Elizabeth]

Thanks for dropping by and for your lovely words.

[angel]

You are welcome any time. I love your poems and hope you the best. Have a good day.

[angel]

I am sorry I wrote my comment in the wrong place. But it is amazing and from the heart. So True. Thank you for the comment on my poem.

[Elizabeth]

It's alright :)
Also I love your poems...

[angel]

Thank you so much

[L.C. Jarrette]

this reminds me of the song "Lucky" by Britney Spears. love your metaphor. it's the same with us humans. sometimes we envy someone, not knowing that, that same person envies us as well.

[Elizabeth]

thank you so much for your review

[L.C. Jarrette]

you're welcome darkmist..

[W1STER1A]

I agree that it was a bit rushed. A longer transition may help the writing seem to move at an even pace. But using the moon as a metaphor for the human condition is brilliant along with a wonderful display of vocabulary.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you for your honest review. I'll definitely work on the transition.

[Elizabeth]

When i re- read this, it seems a bit rushed. What do you think of it?