The Smiling Garden Hater

The Smiling Garden Hater

A Chapter by Darksummerswind

8:25 A.M.

The Garden of Eden

       

       The Garden of Eden, an artifically created beauty and major tourist attraction of Haven. Its name comes from the large and breath taking garden that's located on the tallest hill on the western side of Haven. People come from all over the world to see it for various reasons. Plant and animal lovers come to view the multitude of animals and plants.  Scientists come to study the process of how it was created.  Others come for inspiration and others seek out love. The Garden is surrounded by a large hedgerow that stretches for miles. The inside of the Garden is like a zoo with various sections that hold animals and plants from all over the world. A staircase near the entrance leads to a sealife exibit underneath the Garden. In the center is the crown jewel, an entire exibit that houses extinct species brought back to life.  All in all, about ninty-nine percent of the people that visited the Garden would tell you it's one of the most amazing places in the world.

       Sixteen year old Thane Silverman, however, happened to be part of the one percent that would tell you that picking their fingernails had been more interesting. He was a Gardenian, someone who lives near the Garden. Only the wealthiest residents could afford a house on one of the smaller hills that surround the Garden.  Most people believe that the Gardenians were blessed to be able to live near such a beauty of man. Thane completely dissagreed with this belief. He wasn't one to be impressed by animals and plants, even formerly extinct ones.  Thane didn't find very much interest in anything these days. He was a decently dressed kid, wearing a black sleeveless t-shirt, blue jeans, and white sneakers. His black hair was short enough that people could see his widow's peak.  At the moment he was walking towards one of the smaller parks, nicknamed "Mini-Gardens", that were usually located throughout the smaller hills.

       Thane kicked a soda can out of his way, sending it into a passing group tourists.  Some of them glared at Thane but he paid them no attention; he had other matters on his mind.  Thane looked his wrist watch and scowled, it was still an hour away till his aunt and uncle would be off to work.  Thane kicked at a trash can, startling a few people near him.  I wouldn't be in this mess if that kid had just kept his mouth shut. Thane grinned as he recalled the satisfaction of knocking out the bully who had been making fun of his mother and sister.  Granted it had gotten him suspended for a week but it still felt good standing up for himself.  The real trouble began when he got home.  His uncle was furious, saying that Thane was going to embarrass him and then he dragged Thane off to his room.  Thane had tried to muffle his screams, even when his uncle got out the belt, but he didn't think he succeeded.  Thane felt a tingle run through his back and started to walk faster.  His sister, Nanami, had managed to cover up the bruises later that night. 

       Thane's uncle and aunt were expecting him to be in his room the whole day, but he had sneaked out his window and climbed down the tree that was in the backyard.  He had decided to kill some time before heading back to house, his uncle surely going to send someone to check up on him.  Thane suddenly felt a hand on his shoulder.  He froze, thinking for a second that maybe his uncle had come looking for him after finding out he wasn't in his room.  "Well if it isn't Muhammad Ali." A joyful voice said.  Thane's fears disappeared and he looked over his shoulder to see his best friend Sebastian Walker.  Sebastian was a strange kid and most kids in school didn't want to be seen around with him.  Thane didn't really care whether he was seen with Sebastian or not, he was Thane's only real friend. Sebastian was currently wearing white t-shirt with a band Thane didn't know on it, black shorts, and sandals.  He had even pierced his ears and nose and had dyed his hair orange and then shaved it into a mohawk.

       "Hey Sebastian, how's it going?"

       "Well the kid you clocked, I think his name was Bobby, well he's apparently still in the hospital.  Everybody's talking about it. Some of the guys are saying that you threatened to kill him." Thane groaned, the last thing he need was a rumor going around making him look like some kind of homicidal maniac. Sebastian patted Thane on his back. "Look on the bright side." He said with grin. "At least you don't have to listen to Mrs. Thatcher's lectures.  God that woman can ramble."  Thane laughed, remembering what he liked about Sebastian the most.

       "What are you doing here anyway? School's that way." Thane pointed his thumb over his shoulder.

       "You didn't think I wasn't going to let you have all the fun of a week's vaction from school without me did you?"  Sebastian said playfully punching Thane in the shoulder.

       "So why did you really come this way?"

       "Ok fine, you got me.  I met this girl and-"

       "Wait! You met a girl and didn't tell me?"

       "I just met her a week ago."

       "So me being suspended was just a convenience?"

       "Completely."

       Thane sighed, not exactly the answer he wanted to hear.  "So who is this mystery girl?"

       "Her name is Nyree and she's the most beautiful girl in the world."  Thane snorted at that. Every girl Sebastian met was the "most beautiful in the world."  Thane tuned Sebastian out as he continued to ramble on about his new girlfriend, something Thane had to learn over the years.  They continued to walk, Thane pretending to listen to Sebastian as he continued to talk.  Finally Greenwood Park came into view and Thane put a hand on Sebastian's shoulder to stop him and pointed at the park.  Sebastian nodded and they started to walk towards it.

       A voice suddenly called out behind them, "STOP!" A pair of hands grabbed both Sebastian and Thane by the backs of their collars.  They both cried out in surpise as they were spun around to come face-to-face with their class president, Mizuki Kimura.  Mizuki was the "perfect" girl of Thane's high school.  She had perfect grades, was great at sports, and was the most beautiful girl in school. Every boy, including Thane, had a crush on her. She had wavy black hair that stopped at her mid-back with two white ribbons intangle in it. She was currently the school uniform which consisted of a white blouse, black pleated skirt, and black shoes and white knee socks.  Her face, which usually had on a smile that was warm and encouraging, had such a fierce look on it that it made Thane want to shrink into his clothing. Even Sebastian looked shocked to see her.

       "P-president Mizuki, what a surprise to see you here!" Sebastian said, his voice giving off fear.

      Mizuki stepped up to Sebastian's face and grabbed his shirt. "You know exactly why I'm here Sebastian! You skipped class and I had to get the teacher's approval to go look for you. I won't allow people to skip class as long as I'm class president!" Thane swore he saw fire erupt in Mizuki's blue eyes. 

      "But how'd you know I'd be here?"

      "Because you texted Michael that you'd be meeting your girlfriend at Greenwood."

      "And he just told you that?"

      "I can be pretty convincing when I'm dangling a weeks worth of detention in someone's face." Mizuki gave Sebastian a smirk of triumph.  Thane heard Sebastian grumbling something that didn't sound pleasant. Thane thought about just continuing towards the park when Mizuki finally noticed him standing there. She let go of Sebastian as she turned to look at Thane. When Thane saw that Mizuki looking at him, his face turned red.  "Hey, aren't you the kid who got suspended for fighting Bobby? Thane right?"

       Thane cringed at the words at if they were knives and nodded feebly with his eyes towards the ground. Normally he would have responded with something more agressive but his tongue had tied itself into a knot at the moment.  Then Mizuki did something unexpected, she gently put her hand on Thane's arm.  Thane was shocked by this action and his face became even redder. He looked up at Mizuki and saw that she had a look of sympathy on her face.  "I'm sorry I didn't stop him sooner. I didn't think he would go as far as he did." Thane gave her a small smile.

       "It's alright, someone had to take him down eventually. It just happened to be me.  It's not your fault."  Thane hoped he didn't sound like a complete idiot.

       "But you got suspended from school because of what he did."

       "I'm not angry at that, in fact it's kind of like a vacation."

       "It'd just be ashame to have you expelled or drop out like Noah."

       "Wait, who's Noah?"

       Now it was Mizuki's turn to turn red. "Um, no one. Just thinking out loud."

       Mizuki obviously wasn't telling the whole truth but Thane didn't push the issue. "Are doing anything after school?" It took a moment before Thane realized what he just said. Wait, why did I say that

        Mizuki apparently wasn't expecting that question as she looked a bit shocked at Thane.  "Um, I'm going to be busy today but I'm going to be free tomorrow."

        "Oh, well, that's great.  Do you want to get together?"  Thane couldn't believe what he was saying.

        Mizuki smiled at Thane, making his heart skip a beat. "Sure, there's a little cafe that I know. We can go there after school tomorrow."

        Thane couldn't believe it, she had agreed! "That sound's great. I'll meet you after school?"

        "Sure.  Now if you'll excuse me I have a student to take back to school.  Speaking of which, where do you think you're going!" She yelled at someone behind Thane. He looked over his shoulder to see Sebastian panic and runaway.  Guess he snuck off when I was talking to Mizuki. Mizuki took off after him and barely five seconds passed before Mizuki was walking past Thane again, this time dragging a struggling Sebastian by collar. She was saying how Sebastian would have to change out of his clothes to put on the school uniform. Sebastian looked at Thane for help but Thane held up his hands to show he couldn't, and wouldn't, do anything.  Sebastian groaned as Mizuki continued to complain.

       Thane watch them go off towards the school before it dawned on him what just conspired.  I have a date with Mizuki. Thane smiled.  "I have a date with Mizuki Kimura!" He shouted, not caring who heard. He thought about heading home to figure what he'd wear but he checked his watch and saw that it still to early to head home.  Thane looked at Greenwood Park and shrugged.  He had come this far and now he was in a good mood so he continued walking towards the park.  As he walked, a smile still plastered to his face, Thane absently thought that maybe things were starting to look up for him.



© 2011 Darksummerswind


Author's Note

Darksummerswind
Gardenian [ˈɡɑ'rd(ǝ)n'ian]
Nyree [NIE-ree]

My Review

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Reviews

Alright first things first cause I know you want it...You have the Garden of Eden as an artificially greated beauty int he first sentence and I think you meant to put created. Secondly even though its not a big thing on the second line you have two spaces between on the so it looks like "on the". And lastly when Thane asks Sebastian why he's here you either missed a word or put in the wrong one. It should say either "Why are you here anyway?" or "What are you here for anyway?" and yours says "What are you here anyway"...And I think you spelled convienent wrong but I'm not too sure

I loved the chapter . I like how you introduced it and brought in Thane. It seems similar to someone who lives close to Cedar Point may find it boring after awhile as opposed to someone like me who would go everyday if I could lol

I enjoyed the dialogue and exposition you gave to Sebs too. The way they talked seemed just liked you described as Sebs having really no friends...Sebs was also pretty funny too I like Thanes comment on how Sebs says every girlfriend is beautiful lol

Geez I didnt know Class President's had the authority to leave school to find people skipping lol. Must be a strict school. I thought her character was nice and she seems like a nice girl so far. I do want to hear more about this Noah character as well

That said another great chapter and speaking of after reading the first two chapters this was something COMPLETELY DIFFERENT and had me wondering if I went to the right book lol. It went from reapers and mutilation to school and suspension lol...Either way it was a nice break and I know sooner or later it will tie in. Keep up the good writing

Posted 12 Years Ago


Interesting.
I would suggest to start off the interaction between characters sooner so it doesn't read like a synopsis of a history report. I did the same thing when i started my novel. Start out with an action sceen of what happened in this garden and set some rules. Conflict creates tension and tension creates interest.
i hope this helps.

Posted 12 Years Ago



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Added on July 19, 2011
Last Updated on August 26, 2011
Tags: Garden, Eden, Anger, School, Hooky


Author

Darksummerswind
Darksummerswind

Eternal Limbo, PA



About
I'm a writer who delves into all genres but particularly fantasy and science fiction, with a dabble of urban fantasy here and there. more..

Writing