Bloody fangs

Bloody fangs

A Poem by David the writer
"

I stopped making poems to write a series, so this is a short poem so I can get back used to writing poems.

"

Can't you smell the blood

I can't wait to feel it flood

My fangs ever so dry

As the clouds pass through the dark sky,


Sneaking through the night, and into a small village

I'm thirstier just thinking about pillage

Their blood, their life

With my fangs as sharps as a knife,


I sneak through a window staying in the shadow

That has a clear path I follow

They laid in the bed not knowing that their Doom is about to strike

I laugh with the moon as I get more and more psych


I loom over them with my sharp fangs hanging out of my lips

I bite into his neck silently, and their satisfying blood now drips

I leave the small home now wrecked

I look over to see the victim bloody necked.  

© 2012 David the writer


Author's Note

David the writer
I know this was short, but was it sweet?

My Review

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Reviews

Good work overall, needs some minor editing and I'm not sure about the colored bits of text, but it was a fun read overall.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

Totally rad, David! Loved the darkness factor of it. Awesome.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

Guest

49 Years Ago

Guest

49 Years Ago

Huh, wow. It's dark and unique. I like it. Great write. :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

Guest

49 Years Ago

Greetings from the host of the contest "Of Blood and Eternity".

I see you like to tell stories, at least with this poem. Those poor villagers, the hapless victims of a beast in the night. But then, isn't that the heart of vampire lore? They come, they despoil, and then they are gone, leaving only ruin in their wake.

A very nice write.

Thank you for entering my contest.

-Caradoc

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

FRACKIN' AWESOME

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

Vampires are so sweet, aren't they? You gotta love em ;)

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

Dark, evil, gloomy, descriptive, captivating, suspenseful..... I love this poem!!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago

bloody, dark and gloomy
I love this poem

Posted 6 Years Ago


Evil...check, blood...check, gore.....check! Great job this was really well written my friend!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Guest

49 Years Ago

I loved the descriptive nature of the poem, it made the poem easy to see in my mind and feel in my soul.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Guest

49 Years Ago


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1008 Views
13 Reviews
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Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on August 4, 2012
Last Updated on August 4, 2012
Tags: monster, short

Author

David the writer
David the writer

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