Eternal Youth

Eternal Youth

A Poem by David Lewis Paget
"

Be careful what you wish for...

"

I was travelling through a countryside

That I’d never seen before,

As it grew dark, the mountainsides

Loomed threatening, over my car,

The cloud hung low in a louring sky

And my headlights cut through the gloom,

Ahead on the twisting, bending road

I had hopes of a cosy room.

 

There wasn’t a house or a farm out there,

The valley was threading down,

The deeper it went, the darker yet

With still no sign of a town,

I thought that I’d have to drive all night

And my eyes were growing dim,

When back in the trees, I saw a light

And a sign: ‘The Dew Drop Inn’.

 

I pulled at the bell for the Publican

And I heard a shuffle inside,

A shadow loomed, and the hinges creaked

And the door swung open wide,

A man so gaunt that his face was grey

And his sallow cheeks were thin,

Stood trembling in the doorway there

In the hall of the Dew Drop Inn!’

 

I followed him in, not saying a word,

He motioned me into the bar,

Then poured me a whiskey and water

While I stared at a glass topped jar,

It drew my gaze as I sipped my drink

For the contents bubbled and swirled,

And I said: ‘Just where is the Dew Drop Inn?’

He replied: ‘At the End of the World!’

 

His voice came bubbling out of his chest

Like the rasp of a rusty saw,

His hands were trembling, where they lay

And he kept his eyes on the door.

‘That jar, it changes its colours, look!

From red, through green and gold…’

He said: ‘They told me one sip from that

And a man would never grow old!’

 

I stared at him, and I saw him frown

With a tear at the edge of his eye,

This ancient man with the trembling hand

And I said: ‘Well, that was a lie!’

He shook his head and he turned to me

‘It depends what you want it for,

I was twenty-two when I took my sip…

I’m a hundred and sixty four!’

 

‘I didn’t age for a hundred years

I revelled in youth, so long,

But suddenly I grew weary, thought

That there must have been something wrong!

I lost the zest for a youthful life,

Was beginning to feel my years,

All of my friends were dead and gone,

This life is a valley of tears!’

 

‘You’re telling me that one sip from this

Will give me a hundred - True?

I’ll still be fit and I’ll still be strong,

At a hundred and thirty two?’

‘You will, but there’s a condition

You must take on the Dew Drop Inn,

And stay in this cursèd valley then

‘Til a seeker of youth walks in!’

 

I’m standing behind the counter with

My eyes on the outer door,

I’ve stood like stone for forty years

And paced a track on the floor,

The Publican left, the moment I sipped

He went with a joyous cry,

In search of a path from the Dew Drop Inn

Where at last, he could finally die!

 

David Lewis Paget

© 2012 David Lewis Paget


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Reviews

This is brilliant! I love fantasy writing, but even more so I love when writers explore the problems found in what would appear to be an idyllic situation thanks to the endless boundaries of a fantasy world such as eternal youth. Really enjoyed this piece. Thank you for writing it!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Everything comes with a price:) And you can't have everything you want in life in a box. There is always something you need to give up. There is always something you need to sacrifice. In this case, the main character sacrificed his freedom or even evrything he got for eternal youth.

You have a good literary technique that goes beyond the simple and evident intention of words or actions. Its loosely defined structure creates an impression of effectiveness. Your choice of words easily conveys images into the minds of the audience.

Magnífico!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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This reads like a bard sitting in front of a fire reciting a tale. It is a wonderful read and I was happy to read it more than once.

I had a slight issue with the flow in two places, but other than that it flowed so beautifully that I did not want it to end.

"And I said: ‘Just where is the Dew Drop Inn?’
He replied: ‘At the End of the World!’"
and
"But suddenly I grew weary, thought
That there must have been something wrong!"

Masterfully crafted words.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Brilliant composition and incisive theme - as almost everyone would want eternal youth. The poem's suspenseful story holds the reader from first line to the last, bring him literally into the gripping story/scene with well chosen (as always) words full of vivid imagery and emotion. (I am still breathless after reading the last line.) Bravo David!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

OH...
I LOVE THIS...
MY FAVORITE PARTS...
WERE WHERE YOU...
REPEATED THE DEW...
DROP INN TO...
KEEP THE READER...
IN YOUR GRASP...
SUCH A GREAT WRITE...

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

absolutley amazing.
this is probably the best poem i have read in my lifetime. I really don't think i can pay a bigger compliment then that to be honest.
thank you for putting it on here, i will be reading it again and will definatley check out more of your work. superb!

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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3239 Views
58 Reviews
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Shelved in 11 Libraries
Added on July 9, 2012
Last Updated on July 9, 2012
Tags: Inn, publican, trembling, age

Author

David Lewis Paget
David Lewis Paget

Moonta, South Australia, Australia



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