Terrible

Terrible

A Poem by Decidious wind
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An inner soliloquy/battle between my heart and my thoughts

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Am I terrible? I do not ask for the intention of glorifying the language of this whatever. I require an immediate answer. Lately, reality has become...unrealistic. Brothers enemies and enemies brothers. The world clashes on a foreign axis.


I thought…. I believed, always, that a human heart is limited to one.


But it’s not

It’s not


It’s NOT!


                                    and I feel terrible


Terrible.


When had it become a sin to drown deeply in the warmth of another’s? Humans were born explorers, shouldn’t swimming oceans be permissible? Actually, it has been a sin since the day humans were born.


Our hearts are wired to function

in a certain way

to sparkle for the one

and only.

Only.

That one.

A norm made by humans for humans.

A program. A flawless program to keep their blooming emotions

Sheathed.

A human heart isn’t allowed to grow.

For growth,

Is a glitch in the system.


A heart is everlastingly held under constraints. With the purpose of limiting its freedom. For the freedom of a heart is sin. Little do those imbecile humans know, that a heart’s power is on top of any chains or padlocks they place on it. Inevitably, the constraints are enchanted by the warmth of the light that they attempt to conceal. Till, the barricade becomes warmth itself. Everything falls into the hole of terribleness. How could they not? It’s terribly bright! Terribly beautiful. The feeling of growth and development. Even I found myself in that hole one day.


Very recently

Since then,

My poetry developed

It’s not as poetic

But there is something

Different

I can’t make out what it

Is

Maybe it is

Good

For the soul.


The question remains

Am I terrible?

Yes I am!

Ghada, don’t make art out of

Sin.


Sins should never be glorified. Hide your sins. Conceal them. Strive for perfection. Don’t retell the tales of your journey. Lock them with the rest of your tales. In an opaque pandemonium. A different dimension, preferably.


Too many expectations. Lots to do, lots to remember. I broke down. Someone please, please….. Reformat my system there are way too many glitches to the extent of losing count.. Is this even normal? Place stronger constraints on my heart! Reprimand me! I won’t allow my emotions to get in the way.


What way?

I won’t allow it.

Allow what?

Emotions were never reason enough for a safeway out of death sentences and punishment.

Not reason enough to hide me behind double doors.

Tyranny prevails. Whilst emotions resume under malevolent suppression.

Because you allow it to.

Afteralll, the heart is a woman

Women know no better

Housewives in the bed

I am terrible. I will s**t-shame my heart until it sees no other choice than  to shut up.

It’s terrible.

Constraint it!

Reprehend it with chains

Put a padlock on its mouth

Women shouldn’t express their opinions

Dim their light

Over my dead body…

Will its light dare grasp the height of the stars and the horizons

If chains aren’t enough…

Then fill it with ardor

Ardor rather than reason

For love is not reason

It is for the weak

Not for tyrants such as,

Myself?


Terrible. Terrible that you are for willingly combatting the strength of oppression on a mere organ. Humans are prisoners of society, and to break free of that cell is sin. So yes…

You are terrible

Why?



© 2017 Decidious wind



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Reviews

A wonderful poem. Living, sin and great journey. Need the three. A covert life. Is a terrible life. I told my kids. Travel, test life and have some fun. Many years to be old and wise. I enjoyed your thoughts. Made me think this morning. Thank you dear friend for sharing the amazing poetry and thoughts.
Coyote

Posted 2 Weeks Ago


Decidious wind

2 Weeks Ago

Thank you very much. I'm flattered that my poetry has made your morning.
Coyote Poetry

2 Weeks Ago

You are welcome my dear friend.

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Added on October 6, 2017
Last Updated on October 6, 2017
Tags: romance, love, society, feminism, gender roles

Author

Decidious wind
Decidious wind

About
I am a writer A photographer And an artist. I've been writing ever since I was 9 years old. My dream is that my writing reaches someone's heart. Writing is a passion, not a hobby. I am also .. more..

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