A Horrible First Sentence #2

another badly written first sentence for that contest

So, I'll begin at the beginning then, because beginning at the end seems kinda silly despite the fact that so many people do it and are actually able to pull it off, but seriously in my opinion beginning at the beginning just makes so much more sense than beginning at the end because then you give the whole ending away and who honestly wants to read a story they know the end to by the first sentence instead of going through the suspence of hundreds of pages of text that involve intense romantic scenes and dramatic plot changes that make them want to throw the book across the room by page three-hundred-fourty-two because the author won't get to the point and goes off into tangents about things that have absolutely nothing to do with the story, but secretly do beacuse the author of the story knows better than you, in the first place and then finally reaches a close to satisfying ending, which in truth in is the perfect ending because once again the author knows better than you because he's the author and it's his story so he knows how the story is supposed to end, which is the ending he wrote, at the end because that's where the ending belongs rather than the beginning... where the beginning belongs... um... yeah, so here's the beginning of my story.