The Wakeup Call

A Poem by Zac

With many of our lives

Everything surprises us,

We feel like everything is just right

But then, it only gets worse,

That is when we get the wakeup call.

All our hard work,

All of our labor,

What for?

In the end we get a wakeup call,

And it all seems to drift away.

The way it happens,

When it happens we don’t know

The places we go,

The memories we share,

As we also receive a wakeup call.

We all have our dreams,

But we also have our sorrows,

Many times theses are renewed,

But many times they are taken away.

With our disappointment

Comes renewal

When we all receive

The wakeup call

© 2015 Zac

Author's Note

Please comment and give me your opinion on this poem
constructive criticism is wanted

My Review

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Reviews

Riley Justine

I really like this one! There's so much truth to this.
Literally next to perfect. If I could suggest one thing, I would say that you could try not to use the word [we] so many times.
Otherwise this piece is extremely well written!

Posted 9 Years Ago

9 Years Ago

Thank you very much.

Glen Yumang Manese

The pace of this goes fast...the theme & what it represent is taking in by the reader...anyone can get a point of view from it...I mean with a bit of aging --- not just the beginner learning to ride a bicycle...I do see your expressiveness to repeat the clincher line: wake up call...I do believe that can be depleted in areas & still get the point across...as for this line needs a slight fix:

Many times theses are renewed,
---
Many times these are renewed,

---
to add to this is those lines:

Many times theses are renewed,
But many times they are taken away.
---
Many times theses are renewed,
But at times they are taken away.
---

Of course -- without reconstructing these whole verse --- those are areas that can change --- this is your work...do what makes your happy...