Up too Late One Night

My mind slowly started to wake before my eyes were really open. My brain had been on overdrive for the past few weeks, my cloudy thoughts almost seemed to impair my rationality. Nothing really seemed to make sense. Everything was decided by emotion rather than clarity and realism. What shirt I would wear, what pants to put on, what pair of shoes would look best with my outfit? Everything seemed to run together in some sort of cruel, damning pattern And yet somehow, even though there was no clear end in sight, the finish line was apparent in my brain, and the joys of victory brought thoughts that couldn’t even compare to any other. And then, my eyes opened.

            I saw her lying there, chest moving slowly up and down, in peace and in sync with her mind and soul. Her blonde hair fell down to her neck, and it scattered from there. A few of the strands were covering her face. Not enough that it could ever be embarrassing, but just enough to know that she was definitely asleep. She always had this strange aura about her, one in which that never really ceased to bring up emotions. Whether it was an emotion that she was going to kill you because you never told her your secret and she told you hers, or just an emotion of pure ecstasy, I was always happy to see her. Her blanket lay near the end of her bed, just barely covering her feet. One hand lay right beside her face, the other, in some crudely thought out design, lay behind her back. Her eyes flickered for a second as her hands moved up to scratch her face, and then moved back down again. She lay motionless once more. I gently looked above her to see my closed door. There was no light shining through the cracks, no obnoxiously loud television blaring in the background. There was only peace and serenity. I didn’t bother looking at the time, because I really didn’t care. Looking at her gave me peace, and yet for some reason, for some mind challengingly hard reason, I had awoken in the middle of the night, my mind stirred into subjects I didn’t even want to begin to comprehend.

            I shut my eyes for the first time after opening them, and nothing happened. No subconscious began to take me over; no higher thoughts had started to ease my brain of its pressure. I opened my eyes once more. I glanced at her again. She was in the exact same position. A peaceful one, and yet an unfinished one. There was a touch to it that seemed, rather inhumane. Perhaps it was just that aura of hers, but whatever it was, it felt… right to me. I looked back down at her hand. Not quite flat on the bed, and in the perfect position that if it were to be bothered, she wouldn’t wake. I looked at her face, and took her hand in mine. I gently caressed the top of it, feeling the smoothness of it, relaxing as it barely reacted to my touch. I gripped her hand in mine, shutting my eyes tightly. All that was me, all that I would ever become, was inside me, and was flowing between the both of us somehow. All pure emotions, all raw feelings, just seemed to emanate out of her aura. Everything she ever was or will be filled me in my entirety. It became the air I breathe, the scenes I witness, the aromas I smell, the whispers that I hear, all developed into me. And that blanket of feelings surrounded me, covered my heart with all that it was, at that moment.

            Slowly, I put her hand down. Her thoughts still seemed to race in tune with mine. I still had my hand on top of hers, not ever wanting to let go. Eventually, I did though. I put my hand in that same relaxed position she once had it in, and soon fell asleep to the sound of her breathing. And at that moment, at that one precise instance in time, I was truly in love.

            Her eyes slowly opened, and she stared at me. Unbeknownst to me, I was already asleep; she smiled, returning the favor. She closed her eyes, and put her hand over mine, without even needing to look where it was.