What I Found

I found you in the dark.

Through my never ending abyss, 

I heard your voice.

I stumbled into the light,

Blinded by the lustrous majesty

And I looked into your eyes.

In your eyes I found myself.

Myself and all I longed for

And in that moment, I knew

That it would never be mine.

Your eyes are no longer mine

To gaze into, and never will be.

So through the dark I shall trod,

Never to find one quite like you,

One quite so bright,

Bright enough to restore my vision.

Reviews

[GamingGal]

Pros: I like this. I like your wording and I like the story you tell. It's pretty, poetic, and sad all at once. In the third stanza, you think things will brighten up, but they don't. Sure, it's sad, but life isn't always smiles and butterflies now is it?

Cons: None.

Overall: I like this poem quite a lot.

[FireFly]

This poem is something from about two years ago, so its pretty evident I'm creeping on your past writing. But I just want to say that I like the story conveyed by this writing, or at least the way you conveyed it. Good job :)

[Gheeneil]

Deep and articulate. Like GamingGal, I, too, liked how the story was told. Right words at the right line. You've chosen the right words to make each verse sound perfect. Well-written! Keep writing.

[Laranda]

This is really nice. I like where your going with it.