That Hilbilly

A random funny story

Me and Ret the hilbilly were having a conversation

And I was almost overcome with madness & frustration

I was interviewing him while he was playing his Banjo

He was so dumb everyone thought of him as a weirdo

One of my questions, " Have you lived here all your life Ret?"

He responded as I would think, " Well no not yet!"

I also asked him, " How do you sit on that chair with two legs?"

He said, " We have two of our own so why do we need four pegs!"

On the golf corse the other day a guy yelled at him, " FORE!"

The hillbilly yells back at him, " You better stop badgering me before I give you a sore!"

The only instrument he can not play is the Mountain Dulcimer

But he's so stupid if you mention it he'll say, " What is that, a type of fur?"

I said, "no you stupid idiot it's a Kentucky intrument."

He said, " Huh, why would I play a inscent?"

I said no to him one more time and spelled it our for him

And he randomly said, " I need to clean up." and jumped in the creek like a idiotic dimwit!

I told him what a dunce he was and then I said good bye

He said, " this isn't good I was about to drink my rye."

I said, " How can you afford rye you don't even have a job?"

He said, " Well I make a livin' of selling old corn cobs."

I had had enough and I started to walk away

And the only thing that he said that made sence was, " Good riddance and good day!"

 

 

Reviews

[Rad!0Act!v3 T3ddyB3ar Z..]

ha, I can relate to this alot, it made me laugh as well

[DC Gentleman]

ha ha.. this was clever, you painted that scene very well..

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Great poem! Here are a few small things you might want to fix. Just trying to help you become a better writer.


One of my questions, " Have you live here all your life Ret?" This should be "lived."
" You better stoop badgering me before I give you a sore!" Should be "stop"
"that made since was, " Good riddance and good day!" And this should be "sense"


That bath in the creek sounds pretty good to me, if he used Ivory soap so it doesn't kill the fish.
I love to swim in the mountain streams in the summer. I love the Dulcimer. Was it a strumming dulcimer or a hammer dulcimer? Other people are going," Huh?" lol I play mandolin and guitar and go to the bluegrass festivals here. But long before anyone ever heard the word "bluegrass" these mountain folks were making their traditional music. Folks like Earl Scruggs from here in N.C. and Bill Monroe from Kentucky put the music on the map though. A really good write and I enjoyed reading it. Keep up the good work!

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Sounds like you were talking to my great uncle. But when he said he made a living selling corn cobs he meant he was a moonshiner. Good poem.

[Fran Marie]

One of my questions, " Have you live here all your life Ret?"

He responded as I would think, " Well no not yet!"

I also asked him, " How do you sit on that chair with two legs?"

He said, " We have two of our own so why do we need four pegs!"



LOL~po' hillbilly ret~ good one, Lagee~ A real funny write here!! still laughing~:)

[deeps]

OMG! This is so funny, a most enjoyable read here. well written