I'm not dumb, son.

I'm not dumb, son.

A Poem by Elinor Williams
"

Please leave feedback and point out anything I've missed such as grammar or spelling (it's 2am.) Thank you!

"

Can't hear, won't care.
Doesn't matter, don't care.
Torn and ripped up like newspaper,
pieced together, manipulated by a traitor.
An unpopular point of view,
made even more unpopular by you.
Tear the argument apart
and with ignorance you numb the heart
and soul of every fight
I ever fought in spite.
Call me stupid, call me immature,
I'm sure writing it on twitter will cure
your embarrassment and shame
of being nothing but the product of blame.
because I'm a woman? Maybe because I'm young?
But I'll tell you, son, I'm not dumb.
One day I'll speak truth and I will be respected,
Never quietened by a "shhh" or neglected.
One day I'll have more voice than anything you've ever heard.
and I'll have you dangling on a cliff, hanging onto my every word.

© 2013 Elinor Williams



Author's Note

Elinor Williams
Again, sorry if spelling or grammar's a bit off. It's 2am and a bit angry again so wrote this out and I'm now posting, which I might regret in the morning(someone asked me about my opinion then COMPLETELY miss quoted me on twitter and made me look horrid and disgusting. So here's my anger at that.) Enjoy my rant.

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

I don't think I've ever read a poem that referenced social media before but it's good. Personal. I bet this was something you were dealing with at 2am and you chose the cathartic approach of writing out your thoughts in poem form.

I feel for you in this, I really do.

Posted 4 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Ha! Yeah. Sometimes you just have to write that s**t out. Great work, Ellie. Thanks so much for the friend request. Hope to read more of your work very soon.

-kimmer

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

brilliant final line that simply crowns a great poem.....

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nothing wrong with expressing anger Elinor... unless, it is better to have slept on it first....writing it down is ok any time...hurting someone over something "silly"...if that's what it was...might be regretful...don't get me wrong Elinor..if someone deserves it...that's another story altogether...especially if he might have spread something for ALLL to read....
Anyway, I'm rambling.
I actually thought it was very good...honest, sincere and emotional...you can feel the hurt resonating in every sentence....more than the anger in fact....until you got "dumb"....which we all do sometime in our lives to our children..they always know more....My only question was why wait 'til one day....why not today? I assume however this is not about your "son"...
A couple of things I might alter for sake of rhythm perhaps...remove "up" in 3rd sentence and 4th line just keep "manipulated by a traitor"..I think "pieced together" is redundant. I relieve it also helps keep the cadence you began with. Your rhyming (especially the near or slant rhymes) and scheme were spot on. You did an excellent job in this regard and should feel proud of your finished product.
Well done Elinor
allen

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Elinor Williams

4 Years Ago

Thank you very much! I do agree...but I do a lot of this in the heat of my anger or annoyance and I'.. read more
Allen Smuckler

4 Years Ago

You're welcome Elinor...looking forward to reading more
allen
I like the poem. Honest and direct thoughts.
"But I'll tell you, son, I'm not dumb.
One day I'll speak truth and I will be respected,"
If you don't demand respect. Won't receive it. I like the strong ending to the excellent poetry.
Coyote

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I'm terrible at reviewing poetry really, but from all the pieces I remember reading at A-level - this is certainly much more refreshing. Your anger and frustration really come through in this, and I'm sure the wordcap on twitter must limit you from expressing your anger on there! A really great poem and I hope you gave that fella what for! Even though you've told me all about this, I can't remember whether or not you berated him for being the way he was. But I think you did.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Elinor Williams

4 Years Ago

I didn't quite berate him, but I did tell him that I didn't appreciate being talked about or painted.. read more
I love the message in this poem.
Nice message to women out there,you should stand out strong, and never let anyone treat you as dumb.Not the government not men.Stand for your rights women.

Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

⊰ℛℛ⊱
Dangling off a cliff ? Nuu ! I get Vertigo ! :O
Can't really say I've been Shhh'd recently, have been slapped a few times for getting too loud. Chris does that cause I can be a pip.

But I see what you are saying here. "There is no greater wrath than a woman scorned."

Men's useful guide to 3 important words a woman can say !

FINE: This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up.

NOTHING: This means "something" and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you inside out, upside down, and backwards.

GO AHEAD: This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over "Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine."


Posted 4 Years Ago


1 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Elinor Williams

4 Years Ago

Also- Thank you Star*Elaina and Jord :')
Ruhoun Q. Geins

4 Years Ago

I'm sorry for eavesdropping, but I kind of found his/her comment/review funny. Don't get me wrong, I.. read more
dw817

4 Years Ago

Sorry ... perhaps I have had women tease me in the past with different altercations ? Also those '3 .. read more
I think its grand that you logicised and rationalised and wrote this though you were angry Elinor. Its quite clear who will be the winner in the long run but unfortunately some guys like to stir to score cheap points. Stirring eventually leads to trouble for the stirrer though and a bad reputation so take heart...
X

Posted 4 Years Ago


Sharp and to the point, love it.

-Bliss

Posted 4 Years Ago



First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

774 Views
30 Reviews
Rating
Added on July 29, 2013
Last Updated on July 29, 2013
Tags: anger, rip, torn, angry, poem, poetry, newspaper, political, heart, soul, words, word, english, language, enjoy.

Author

Elinor Williams
Elinor Williams

Wales, United Kingdom



About
My name's Ellie, I'm 19 years old and I'm a Film Production Student. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Did it? Did it?

A Poem by CRZ