Don't

Don't ask me if I slept well.

You most certainly know that there

was no sleep for me last night.

Lying in the dark

Waiting for a touch that

wouldn't come.

If a caress could cross miles

If by thinking of holding me--

I thought I saw a shadow move but

Found that I could not Will you to me.

Don't laugh.

Bothered as I was

I gradually fell

Into a fitful kind of release--

Set loose from a body that longed for your touch.

"I slept fine."

"And you?"

Reviews

[Jonhoi Vaughn]

I am always rendered speechless at your efficient use of words! I most certainly felt like I was a part of this poem and I was the antagonist! It just has that effect of drawing me into that role. Well done! The evolutionary process of the persona was not only subtle. It was necessary. I long for words like these to sleep peacefully on my pages ^_^

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Such a powerful mix in this piece. There nis dissapointment and longing, emptiness and sadness but also an anger. And all told in a few lines. Wonderful!

[paul]

the way you write, makes words seem so soft... the way you string them together.

and that ubiquitous answer we all hide behind: "fine."

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

so much in those simple lines , in those simple words .... you said so much describing your longing for love , for a touch , hiding your pain deep inside

[Dark Master]

Something natural, but bitter in your words as if you have been waiting many a night for that touch.........maybe a promised touch that doesn't quite reach you. Your question and answer give off a sense of.............."Do you feel quilty?" I think you are tired of waiting.

DM

[JiltedButterfly]

great poetry for me, these days, is work that makes me think - "I wish I could say it that succintly and poignantly"

this is terrific!

[Adrian K. Smith]

There is so much that could be said but should not be said about what can be seen in this particular piece. I find it odd that I am at a loss to see much of what was seen by the others, but we all have a tendency to see what we see and little more even when it is pointed out, even if we agree that we see it - we generally do not.

A longing, as many of us know, leaves us to stare blankly at the ceiling or the walls - wishing - wanting - fidgeting in the obvious denial of that longing... of course, I should not say it - and I will not say it, but it does not take much to imagine a certain particular fit of release that might leave one at peace enough to manage some slumber... but it will not a restful sleep, as there seemed to be a bit of angry frustration...

No, sleeping well did not touch many last evening...

[Fabian G. Franklin]

We escape our sufferings in sleep and gain strenth for the new trials of tomorrow. Its like the proverb says " Sufficient to the day is the trouble of the day" Some dreams I hate to wake from and some I can't wait to get out of. This was a romantic longing piece of poetry. I like the incorporated longing with dreamy quality of imagination you portray here. Very nice.

[Collect-Eye]

I fell asleep in less than perfect union w/ a dozen souls in various electronic hues...
maybe it was the five cups of coffee, followed by stromboli, a night of singing blues, and 3 episodes of the office..it's hard to say.
Sometimes I imagine my bed is a vortex to another place..and my friends have had some success w/ astral traveling..but w/out conscious memory, what's the point, really?
So, if you hear ME laughing, it's only the madness setting in..trust me on that one.

[An Ordinary Woman]

I remember this one ... it something I feel often but for different reasons. It is beautiful Emily, in spite of the pain it holds. An awesome poem!