The Forest

You stand at the forest edge, the voice calling you forward, “come find me”. You take a step into the forest, now submerged in complete darkness. You hear the voice again “hurry, you're running out of time”. You start walking toward a white figure in the distance. You start stumbling to dark to see. The trees blocking all light. “Come on its not that hard”, the voice speaks out. You see the figure, its closer now. You run toward it catching up. You jump forward catching its arm. When you open your eyes you're in a clearing, a branch in your hand. You stand up, there's a light ahead, you run. “Where are you” the figure appears then vanishes, You find a pond, sitting in the light. Water so clear you can see the muddy bottom. From behind you comes a growl, a wolf, you start running. A small run down hut appears in front of you, you run in, looking for anything. You grab the first the you see, a knife, perfect. The wolf closes in. You turn around and stab it, as it erupts into a thousand crows.

A sobbing starts.

“Why aren't you looking?” the voice cries. You turn, the white figure is sitting in the corner. You walk toward it, reaching out. “NO!” the figure screams and disappears. You run out scared, not caring where you are. After a while you walk, wondering how far the forest goes. You hear the voice again, “you're almost out of time”. A hedge, to tall to climb, but you have a knife. You hear a child's laughter, you think this must be the end. You cut your way through as the voice calls out, “you’re almost there”.

You stand at the forest edge, the voice calling you forward, “come find me” You take a step into the forest, now submerged in complete darkness. You tighten your grip on the knife and walk. The figure in the distance. A branch snaps nearby, the sound echoing. “You’re time is up”, the figure falls. You start stumbling, to dark to see. There's light ahead, you run finding the pond again. You find something else there, a white figure lying in the grass. You walk toward it.

You look at the figure ghostly and pale, it looks like someone you know. A knife in its hand, a wound on its side, and a puddle of blood. “I told you to find me, but now its too late”, the figure calls out. You look down at yourself, a wound in your side, the knife in your hand. You fall to the ground as you call out.

“Come find me”

Author's Note

ignore grammar problems, and spelling mistakes. Let me know what you think. I might make more like this.

Reviews

[Wolfwind]

Time cycled in a dark evening of tragic evil. That is what I see in this. Over and over again the soul repeats the end, until it can find a different course and break free... when that happens, we don't know... but it would make for a good continuation of the tale.

Nice little piece of ink! Thanks for sharing!

Wolfwind

[Mysana]

The nightmarish story is okay, but it is too confusing. I got what you meant, but I didn't feel it.

[Theo Ratcliffe]

Is there a way I can clearify it for you, I love to hear feed back k and would like to hear ways to improve my writing. I'm open to listening to ideas.

[Mysana]

You describe a play by play of what happens, which allows me to understand. However, you aren't instilling emotion because I don't know what I should feel. Anger? Sadness? Fear? Confusion? Also, never start with description.

[Theo Ratcliffe]

I started with a description because I felt that if I didn't you wouldn't understand what's going on and would make the story more confusing. As for how you should feel thats up to you, I wrote it hoping people would have more then one emotion.

[Kevin Dean]

I would suggest writing more like this. Your very good at it. Nice twist although some people may see it coming. I however like it.