A misunderstanding

This poem is about how one goes through bipolar it's not easy to control

I’m fighting the waves as I try to swim through the ocean
I’m losing myself, my mind and my breath the further I go
I had lost myself when the waves were in motion
As I couldn’t see where I was going So I lost where to go

Who was I? I couldn’t find myself or understand who I was
To days to weeks I lay in bed with lost of words with no motivation
I think to myself why am I here? Why do I have so many flaws
As I lay here I hold back my thoughts to end it all without a conversation

I yell and I scream as if I had lost control of my mind
I throw and I hit as if I had lost full control of my body
This anger, these emotions I have no control as if they weren’t mine
I wonder if these emotions, these thoughts were somebody

This disorder is just a misunderstanding of who we are
But deep down we know we all can go far