What if I told you

What if I told you

A Poem by Woody
"

To my son

"

What if I said you were mortal

And there was an end to your ride?

And that you’d walk through that portal

And be stuck on the other side?

 

What if when departing this earth

You’ll leave behind your possessions?

Does it bring you sadness or mirth

To have no answers, just questions?

 

So live your life now and be bold

Do good unto others, my son

Today Leave your mark on the world

A sure way your name will live on 

 

 

© 2016 Woody


Author's Note

Woody
I'm sure as hell don't know where this came from. I'm as surprised as you are, guys.
if you could improve on the poetic side of this.. thing, I'd be much obliged.

My Review

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Featured Review

You have asked the question that many of us have searched for. This is why there are so many religions. They all have different solutions - some banal, some kindly and some vicious. I asked the same questions in my poem "Wholly Unholy".
You don;t need to improve on your poetic presentation, Woody. It is brief ,concise and realistically worded..

Norman

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

Norman, it must be lack of confidence but I can never admit to myself thatt my poems are passable. h.. read more



Reviews

I was expecting something funny but this caught me unaware. It's a very powerful poem and just shows how wonderful you are with words.
We will move on to unknown territory and will have lots of questions and no answers.


Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

your kind words are much appreciated, Haider. that was one of my rare moments of maturedness :)
read more
"What if I said you were mortal" ... what...me? Mortal? Nah, I'm too cool for that lol jk. That was an awesome read, I like the point of view from which is told. Makes me feel like you are talking directly to me...a sense of up-close and personal.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

nah I see from your pic that you're enjoying life and having a good time so I don't want to spoil th.. read more
EMMIE

7 Years Ago

You are welcome and thank you. I wish I could write funny things but my stuff is depressing as hell .. read more
Woody

7 Years Ago

ah well it's good to stop laughing for a moment and ponder the meaning of life. but let me check out.. read more
I love a piece where the words are so powerful that such an aggressive rhyming scheme fades into the background to become the supporting cast.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

thanks a bunch S. glad you found it interesting. one of my rare moments of lucidity :))
Loved it. One of your more serious pieces, I would point out.
Also, did it ever occur to you that there might be answers to all those 'unanswered' questions? That perhaps you have nt looked in the right place for them?
Sometimes, answers find their way to you. Other times, you have to pack your bags and go look for them.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

Iris, thank you so much for stopping to read and review. glad you liked this "unusually serious" pie.. read more
Impressive...quite impressive.
This message is for every son, for every human being.
What i liked most was that you started with
What if I said you were mortal
And there was an end to your ride?
And ended with giving the solution to achieve mortality
Today Leave your mark on the world
A sure way your name will live on

such symmetry captures the reader and gives him some time to reflect upon his life.


Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

thank you very much my friend. I'm not terribly good at poetry but I very rarely would get an idea a.. read more
"What if when departing this earth
You’ll leave behind your possessions?
Does it bring you sadness or mirth
To have no answers, just questions?"
These lines moved me a lot. We are mortal, all of us will meet an end. We will depart, we will leave everything behind. We have plenty of questions that are concerned with death, but there is no answer to them- do we have a re-birth and such sort of unanswered questions.
Nice piece. Keep writing.



Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

thanks loads Vatsal. glad those lines resonated with you. I wish one day, someone on the other side .. read more
Do good unto others...
This is a perfect piece- for peace.
I was expecting a joke-
and got something better.
We do need both.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

thanks a bunch Bacchus. I've had this condition called "seriousness" since I was a child. the doctor.. read more
Bacchus

7 Years Ago

yeah... i need a few more decimals of a percent to get that stupid Top Writers badge... thought the .. read more
Woody

7 Years Ago

I've never paid much attention to that badge. don't know what should be done!
Inspirational and beautiful! I was waiting for a joke somewhere in between those lines but it didn't come! But seriously, this is very beautiful, and very true as well. Thank you for sharing it!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

haha ah well, I have rare moments of seriousness. thank God they're not that many.
thanks a l.. read more
Well now. This is well written - with a light touch and a pleasing rhyme but its a seriously serious topic. My personal favorite is the first verse but the whole message is spot on.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

haha it is serious, isn't it? not like me at all. now and again, I'd try my hand at "serious" poetry.. read more
I like this Woody... Short and to the point, yet keeping some the impact of Kipling's 'If'.
I think we would all like some words of wisdom to leave behind for our loved ones... I would be great to extend this.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Woody

7 Years Ago

oh God, extend this? your words are much appreciated Tinman. thank you. but, at the risk of disappoi.. read more

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1864 Views
47 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on February 1, 2016
Last Updated on February 18, 2016
Tags: life, death, answers

Author

Woody
Woody

Mateur, Bizerte, Tunisia



About
ok, time for an update I think. my old friends have come to know me pretty well, I trust so this is for the new comers. I'm a Tunisian 60-year-old teacher-cum-translator, book worm who enjoys writing.. more..

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