Everything Goes to Hell Book 1 Tales of the Sludgeblood Prince Chapter 4

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(Joseph)

The girl was annoying. And I was trapped sitting next to her on a two-hour bus ride.I tried to stop her from getting on the bus but unfortunately it is public transport and she counts as “public”.

And her questions never stopped:”Does it hurt to bring out your horns and wings and stuff? You have wings so why are you taking the bus? Can’t you fly? Are you scared of heights is that why you won’t fly? What kind of powers do you have? Are you really the Son of Satan? Like Satan, Satan? Have you been to Hell? What’s it like? Where are you headed? Is your name really Joseph? Like Saint Joseph, hubby of the Virgin Mary and adoptive father of our Lord and Savior, well my Lord and Savior, probably not your… well anyway isn’t that ironic? Were the people who attacked me vampires? Are vampires real? If a scientist cut you open would you look human? What-”

I groaned loudly, “Ya know curiosity killed the cat.”

“Satisfaction brought it back.” She retorted  faster than I could get out the final “t”.

“What the f**k?”

“It’s the rest of the phrase.” she said slightly smug.

Her lopsided smirk made my eye twitch. I let my nails lengthen and sharpen into claws. I pressed them into her throat. “Will ‘satisfaction’ bring you back from me separating your head from your body?”

She put her hands up in surrender, her eyes still smiling. “Alright, I get the hint, I’ll shut up.”

I sighed in relief, then laid back against the bus seat and closed my eyes, hoping to get some sleep before we arrived.

But then the humming started. “Do you have a f*****g deathwish?!” I shouted loud enough for the only other people in the bus besides us, the homeless drunk and the goth runaway with her blaring headphones, to turn their heads to the three of us in the back.

Faith shrugged. Celine shook her head. “This is why you should have just let my legion eat her.”

Thaneas materialized beside me. “I agree with the parasite, my lord,” He seemed to internally shudder at his own words, “you should have let the human die.” I swatted him away and he vanished into thin air again, though if I looked close enough I could see a ghostly version of him beside me. Celine and Faith didn’t react to him at all, he hadn’t revealed himself to them.

I relaxed against the bus seat and closed my eyes. Half to Thaneas and half to myself I thought, I’ll ditch her when we get there.