Leaves Fall

Like leaves we all have a span allocated to us, we live we die we fall. What will we awake to, life or death?

Autumn loosens her warming clasp

The east wind blows his frosty call

Leaves release their tenuous grasp

Twirl goodbye as they gently fall

 

Wending their way into rustic oblivion

Descending into the darkened kingdom

Reviews

[Abdul Aziz]

How very nice it feels to be able to read a poem with such cadence here on this site. The meter flows really well in the first stanza while it slows down in the couplet that follows. It follows the semantic context of the poem, providing a very good example of why form is as important as the content.

[Frank]

Aziz, you would be surprised to find some poetry forums hate anything that is traditional in poetry. Some hate the word 'wending' some complain about 'pathetic fallacy' and others complain about the continuing present mood. Thanks for input.

[Great Aunt Astri]

'Descending into the darkened kingdom'. I like to think that it is a passage we 'pass through' it, on our way to .........?

[Woody]

wonderful, Frank! so simple and meaningful. I know next to nothing about iambics and all that but I love the parallel.

[Frank]

Thanks Woody, not many notice parallels :)

[gabrielle]

The flow, rhythm and tone on this piece complement each other. The use of the phrase "dark kingdom" on the last line evoked different interpretations.

[Frank]

Thank you gabrielle, this is an old poem, strange but in another forum it has been attacked in various ways:

1. anthropomorphism

2. pathetic fallacy

3. excessive modifiers

4. and don't like my rhyme

5. the word wending is old fashioned

all this from a forum that has won numerous awards for modern poetry

Yes, darkened kingdom can be simply viewed as the world of decay, then we can apply it as Jacob said to our own demise one day or we can spiritualise it as hell. And then it can simpl be an exercise in iambic poetry that has end rhyme.

Thanks again for reading and commenting

Frank

[gabrielle]

My pleasure. I do not see any reason why this piece became a subject of attack. But of course this is just an opinion from a person without literature/creative writing background. The forum you mentioned may be looking for something else but to me the use of figures of speech makes a piece interesting.

[Frank]

Thanks Gabrielle

[Marie]

From fall into winter... a gentle good-bye. Nice poem.

[Frank]

Thank you Marie, it is a quiet poem, a poem of reflection.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this so parallels the lives of humans...we start to lose our grip on life, our colors finally noticed and appreciated and then we fall to wherever it is we go afterward.

really nice allegory here, Frank...I did read the third line as "Leaves release..."

but so much beauty and insight put into six lines of poetry.

[Frank]

Yes, sorry for the typo Jacob.

This is an old one of mine Jacob, I can say in all honesty you are the only reviewer in perhaps 50 who has gotten this message, it actually is a spiritual message in old iambic lines.

Thak you so much and much appreciated.