Like a body in the rye

I can’t keep this up

At this rate I’m dead

Anxiety strikes at 4 am now

Every f*****g time I’m reminded

My weary and weathered body stops

It’s decaying so slow

I listen to their fading voices

Just listening to them whisper

“he’s fucked up isn’t he?”

They cower before me

They now I am strong

But I am decaying oh so slow

These symbols of lies and broken promises

They shine with every corner I turn

They light up even more

I know I hurt her

It had to have been me

There were no one else

No one to harm her

Just me

I sit with this foul taste in my mouth

I wanna throw myself out from the top of a building

Wanna clash to the ground without fear

F**k.. I could do it right here

I want to conceal my relapse 

I want to be strong for her

Because I know she doesn’t have the strength

I can’t keep this up

At this rate I’m dead

Anxiety strikes at 4 am now

Author's Note

Honest oppinion of my fucked up creation

Reviews

[E.H. Monroe]

Your first lines sound like the opening to one of my stories.
Depending on your appreciation, that means something pretty complimentary or miserably hideous.
Your poems hit like a could be dud firework.
The b*****d looks slow, unable to pop, but then you pick the thing up and it blows off your god damned hand.


My only opion,mm again if it was me, was to take out the second party. Forget her, just throw up your wants for whoever it is. Don't pigeon hole, let it breathe for anyone.

The King of Denmark strikes again

[Coyote Poetry]

4 am in the morning is my favorite time. Kids are asleep and quiet in the house. Death is the easy way. Better to raise cane and go forward. We never know what is beyond the ridge. A excellent poem. Thank you.
Coyote

[Calypso]

nice

[Frifthor (D^2)]

Good poem. The parts about anxiety I can relate to, you never know when they come and that in turn creates more anxiety, an ugly catch 22. You're discussion of her works well with this anxiety, cause you seem to torn between whether you'll be able to make up the pain you caused her earlier, another factor that contributes to this feeling of anxiety. Well done.

[Drako]

i think the fourth stanza is supposed to say know, not now, right?

aside from that, a fairly decent and dark poem. from the material i read, i certainly hope that writing all this is a therapy of sorts for you. it seems you need someone to talk to, and if not a particular person in life, why not use your poetry, your talent, to get out all the feelings you have trapped inside? i look forward to more from you, perhaps even some happier writing when things begin to come together for you

[Red Brick Keshner]

It may be effed up according to you, but it is an organic unity of verbal expression, hence it qualifies the category of poem. You probably want to use 'crash' instead of 'clash'. But if 'clash' was intentional, then it should be followed by 'with' then it would alter the sense of the phrase rather than 'clash to'...