chapter 1

It's been 5 months since it happen. I can still feel the cold fear running through my body, I can hear her voice. I can't sleep. It's my fault, they don't let me think that, but i know it's true. The look on her face is never leaving my mind. 

Eveyday is the same. I wake up, go to school, then theraphy. 

My mom came into my room:

"Do you want to eat anything?"

I dont answer, she knows the answer. Suddenly I feel her getting closer 

"You know, you should eat something, or go out. Sitting here all day long doesn't make it better. I'm sure your friends still remember you."

I still don't answer.

"Lucas, at least try. I know it's hard, I'm not telling you to forget, I'm asking you to not let it destroy your life, to not hold you back. Please"

"It already has destroyed my life"- I thought- "Ok, I'll try" - This time outloud

I could feel her light smile appearing behind my back "Thanks". 

I would try, but I dont know how. 

Someone texted me. It was Jess - a friend. We've known each other since pre-school. I miss hanging out with her. After she moved to the other side of town we haven't hung out at all. Jess is the kind of confident girl that can make you do anything, even if you dont want to. Sometimes it feels like she knows everything, you can rarely see her sad or angry. 

"Lukey, hey, do you want to meet up at the old spot? I really need you now". The text made me anxious, she doesn't sound like herself, something happened. 

I got out of bed and got dressed: black t-s**t, and black jeans. I don't think much about my appearance. I went donw stairs and could her my mom talking on the phone, as i walked in she ended the call, which made me feel suspicious.

"I'm going to hang out with Jess, Ok?"

A smile appeared on her face "Of course, that"s great" 

I nod, and proceed. 

As I got into the gray Hundai. It took me about an hour to get to our "old spot", considering last time I've been there was 3 years ago. When I finally found it, I see Jess sitting on the big rock, like she used to. She turned around, and smiled. With the kind of smile I haven't seen before. It was like a smile of relief. 

"Hey, what took you so long?" 

"I haven't been here in a while. So what's up?"

Her smile disappeared 

"Nothing much, I think I really miss you lately"

"I miss you too, haven't had a dangerous adventure in a long time"' - I said with a smirk 

She laughed "Me neither"

That sursprised me "What? Really,what happened to you"

She gestured for me to sit. And I sat

"After I moved, I found a lot of friends, who were fun. Had a boyfriend. Pretty nice or so I thought. After I heard what happened, I wanted to meet up with you, I'm so sorry I didn't. My boyfriend cheated on me, my friends knew. Everything started falling appart. And I did some bad things."

This was the first time I have seen Jess scared, or sad...ever. 

"No, it's ok. Everything is gonna be-" - I couldn't finish the sentence, I know it won't - "Jess, let's never do that again"

She looked straight into my eyes "Do what?"

"Not be together for such a long time. New start?"

I could see tears rising up in her eyes "Yeah"

We then hugged and didn't talk