No more Disneyland?

one year and still feeling the pain

 

I woke up early, feeling calm, noticng it was just 4 in the morning,

I washed up and brushed my hair, thinking of how the day would go

A sunday ; calm and nice, in the crisp summer air, while the damp grounds give coolness around

I would run down to you and see you smoking near the swings, smiling at me

I would hug you and you would tell me "Don't hug me yet, I don't want you to get cancer"

I would laugh and swing by your side while you tell me stories of the past

How I would laugh and smile by your side, you were the only one who understood

 

I sat down reading a book you gave me, telling me it's good one time

Telling me once upon a time, you loved reading, just like me, I would smile 

knowing I came out just like you, your kindness drowned me and your love protected me

From the harm I had from my parents everyday, shouting and beating, screaming what every

bad thing they could ever possibly say, while you show up, I smile and tear up, the shouting will stop

 

The house keeper runs, gasping, eyes wide, stammering and tearing up,trembling 

I ask whats wrong, she began crying,falling into her knees,scared and speechless

I run down the halls, down the stairs, out the door and there you are,standing

More like hanging. . .

Slowly the world stopped, while us two just seemed to move, you swaying around

the blue plastic cheap rope bruising your neck with poppy marks

Your kind eyes, just like sparkled glass, with no life

Your warm skin turned as white the hair you had always dyed

No more stories, no more books, no more sweet smiles and kind looks

No more swinging by your side, no more staying near your bed at night

No more laughing , no more smiles on our faces, no more learning how to knit

No more picnics with you and me, no more hanging around our special parks

You tie that rope, tying my lungs too, making your breathing stop

While I watch, lungs getting squeezed, slowly painfully, I die inside

Each second, my hearts keeps skipping a beat or two, Seeing you

No gasp, no scream, no cry or lips trembling, I just died inside

Bye bye to the laughter, bye bye to the smiles, bye bye to the happy times

I walk up and remember the days where you cooked us lunch before we go to disneyland

Our favorite place, while you said we would both come back to that place again someday

I fall atlast and cry, Bye bye grandma, I guess there won't be anymore trips to Disneyland

Bye bye Grandma, Its sad we won't go back to Disneyland. . .

Author's Note

I cried while writing this, memories and pains, im trembling from it too, I miss her, I miss my grandma, the closest person I have seen, the person I loved more than my own parents, guess all good things have to be taken at some point, guess you won't know a person's great and true value until after the end....I love you grandma....

Reviews

[bluessadmood]

Oh tis was so sad -sweet ,remembering the good times with her..no more Disneyland
I would run to you smoking near the swings and smiling,dont get my cancer
you will laugh and tell me stories of past ohh how you only understood
I sat reading for once you told me you did too and I would smile
for I came to be just like you,your kindness drowned me,your love protected me
But here they come running gasping trembling,and crying ,and I run after them
And see you standing there ,see you hanging there,no more laughing ,no nore smiling
You tied that rope ,and stopped breathing ,and i died inside
Bye bye laughter ,bye bye happiness,no more Disneland as you promised us to see it again..no more anything
THis was so sad ,sad and sweet ,memorizing someone true and sweet i your life..this stupid life
Done be sorry dear ,it always works that way..it will take every happy thing away..just laugh at it..stupid life
lovely write...

[lindsay]

Ah tears. My enemy sometimes. This was so well constructed and beautifully written. Although it was tearfully sad, I enjoyed this piece immensely, because I can connect with it. Great job!

[Domo]

A true tear wells in my eye for this one. I think you did a beautiful job in writing this. I can easily tell this was written from the heart. It is hard, having someone so close to you taken away. Yes it is true, the pain will never die, and your feeling for her will live on, even when you don't. This was a terrific write, and sick to say it, but I did enjoy reading this one. Great job on this one, a true tear jerk indeed.
~D♥m♥~

[Wolfwind Words]

Aye....You never know till they be gone.

You have written an ode' and a tale of love and a tragedy all in one. Yet..as they wove together within your words..They had a sense of peace and resolution in them. From the title..I would never have guessed the topic or them of the piece.. But I'm glad I came and read it just the same.

Thank you for sharing this view from a window of your life and heart. I hope that it will let people gain some wisdom and comfort in those that they may have lost.

Aaron Wolfie Maycroft