and we danced~

and we danced~

A Poem by Fran Marie
"

..contest write. For Blue Rose cafe challenge

"

and i danced..  as if in a hazy dream

    

                                    like a ballerina


amid lilac's heavenly scent, on a sunlit day


                

                                  and there you lie


in a pitch-black room, sad drowning in misery

 

                    and i danced over to your side


come love i whisper gently, take my hand



                                 and there i stood


waiting determined to break your mood


          and the smell of lilacs grew stronger


with an unpleasant odor



                                   and there you died


as i held your hand in mine


        and then in the black room shone a brilliant light


                                     

  and we danced~




                               

                                  



© 2015 Fran Marie



Author's Note

  Fran Marie
Just a dream that seemed so real

My Review

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Reviews

i had a dream just the other night ... i took a woman's hand to dance and the connection was there but the dance had barely begun when it ended and my dream took me elsewhere ...
the moods of "and we danced" moves from an uplifting dream state to sublime and wistful to so very sad to joyous ... i am spent ;) dreams and poetry can seem so very real ... so well done says i! one thought i had while reading is in this line:
"sad drowning in misery" i wanted more of a pause ... maybe put it on its own line ... i love your poem ..have always had a heart for dance and actually have taken a class or two on several different styles ... the most fun and easy was at a cèilidh held once a month in town ... there was always a teacher to get everyone involved no matter your experience ... your closing with the brilliant light and ".... we danced" puts this firmly in my heart ...it doesn't take long in life to wish upon memories of loved ones ... and truth be told there are all kinds of dancing aren't there ;)))) loved the read Fran .. and great new avatar ..is that your smile?
E.
ps. the lilac becoming unpleasant is brilliant ... so true and so very creative of you.

Posted 3 Weeks Ago


  Fran Marie

3 Weeks Ago

Thanks E..so vey much for reading..dancing is s truly one of the sweetest joys in life..I agree..I s.. read more
Einstein Noodle

3 Weeks Ago

great smile my friend ..it makes me little ol' heart smile to see such light on your face ... peace .. read more
'and we danced'
Fran Marie,
A poem which was concieved from a dream. I like that. I reads like a dream as well. I felt that the lilacs spoke of the fragrance of life and love. The fragrance fills the senses and is demarcation for a change from the death of one thing to the remaking of another. I can identify with the part,
"and the smell of the lilacs grew stronger
with an unpleasant odor
and there you died
and I held your hand in mine
and then in the black room shone a brilliant light
and we danced"
Long review but I needed to finish my thought.
Blessings and loved this!
Kathy







Posted 3 Weeks Ago


  Fran Marie

3 Weeks Ago

Thanks Kathy so much..for the lovely review..so glad you liked my poem..I always appreciate your kin.. read more
Kathy Van Kurin

3 Weeks Ago

Your so welcome! This poem was very fun to read and to ponder. It is good to see how someone else is.. read more
a hint of lilac can be oh' so very seductive and true methinks... too much tho and it can be overpowering and offensive....... if you dont mind me saying so.. 'and we danced' has just the right amount.... a treat for all the senses here....... N

Posted 2 Months Ago


  Fran Marie

3 Weeks Ago

Thanks so vey much Neville..sorry. I'm so late with my thank yous..I always appreciate your reviews... read more
Neville Pettitt

3 Weeks Ago

No problem.. my sincere pleasure..... N
A gay poem, a black poem, and a gayness amid the blackness. Have I read it correctly? Not to mention how much I love the scent of lilac.

Posted 8 Months Ago


Magical!
That is the feeling that came over me while reading your amazing poem! :)

Posted 8 Months Ago


a beautiful dancing poem!


Posted 9 Months Ago


  Fran Marie

8 Months Ago

thanks so much
This was such a gorgeous read. I love the hope at the end.

Posted 9 Months Ago


wow, you have a very beautiful style of writing. Loved this poem. Very well written. Good Job!! :)

Posted 10 Months Ago


  Fran Marie

10 Months Ago

Thank you for your lovely review.. i appreciate so mch😀
Oh. That's so beautifully written. You know, sometimes it's the style of writing that attracts. It's so painful to read yet so beautiful.
This expression has left it's impact on me. All I can say is you are such a graceful writer ♥❤

Posted 10 Months Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

  Fran Marie

10 Months Ago

Thanks so vey much for the lovely comments on my poem.. i appreciate it..😀
I love the use of your words here. It sounds like a movie that should be made. I love the reference to lilacs, as I love lilacs. Great work, keep it up.

Posted 10 Months Ago


  Fran Marie

10 Months Ago

Thanks Regina soi much for the great review on my poetry. 😀
Regina Ann T

10 Months Ago

You are very welcome. I like to let people know that I enjoy their work, it also is a great motivato.. read more

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Added on September 7, 2015
Last Updated on September 8, 2015

Author

  Fran Marie
Fran Marie

Paris, KY



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