Icicles

Triolet

 

 

Outside frozen daggers~icicles hang.
With sun lackadaisical drip away.
Long crystal, clear as glass in window's pane.
Outside frozen daggers~icicles hang.
Sharper the knight's sword cuts quick the cold pain.
Solid liquid rain 'til sun graces day.
Outside frozen daggers~icicles hang.
With sun lackadaisical drip away. 

Reviews

[Tobias H. Reese]

Powerful suggestive metaphors for those with the sagacity to discern them. (though technically speaking, with issues such as the capitalization of every single line rather than the ABaAabAB standard for Triolets, and a disregard for the strict IambTet as well... I'm not sure that the mere line repletion alone is enough to classify it as a Triolet.)
A strong, clever piece here regardless and worthy of respect. Peace.
To any reading this review understand (as you may well know already) Fran Marie is a wonderful writer and it isn't my intent to give an impression otherwise.

[Tobias H. Reese]

"repetition" ...not "repletion". Darned auto-correct. :-)

[Fran Marie]

Thanks, Tobías for reading. And reviewing ..I see what you mean about strict iamb meter..I often mess up on that..however; glad you liked..

[Tobias H. Reese]

I absolutely love it. Sincerely. :-) Make no mistake...

[Mary]

I love the form of this poem- it sets the scene of the icicles. excellent!

[ice]

Nice, Fran
I like the words in the lines you chose as the repeating lines.
And the metaphor of the "Knights sword"
enjoyed

[Olivera]

Beautiful as usual. True magic in the air. Medievalish...

[Wicahpi]

very well written and so magical I think!
great job!!

[Raivenne]

"With sun lackadaisical drip away." What a visually wonderful line!

Beautifully penned Fran! It almost, ALMOST, makes me wish for winter again. An excellent job with the triolet. Thanks for entering this week's Poetry in-FORM-ation Challenge!

[E. M. Murren]

Beautiful work as always. You have such talent. I have a few of those myself outside... they are making me grumpy though. LOL I look forward to spring.