The Sandman

The Sandman

A Poem by Fréyjä Helvití
"

I was pushing myself to write something out of anything, and I just thought about The Sandman. It's a rough draft, kinda raw but I'll be open for reviews hoping it would pusg me to write some more...

"
Daunting mirrors and open doors,
Hear the dreary sleepwalkers snore,
Roaming the dismal weary streets,
Of comfy pillows and warm bed sheets.

It rained of dust in the land of sleep,
Where you so helplessly descended deep.
Drowning like the spilling sand,
That desperately escapes your hand.

Darkness devours what's left of light,
As you fade into the dampening night.
Here the murky beings play,
In their most disturbing way.

But hush now child, go back to bed,
For these are stories made in your head.
You mustn't let the bed bugs bite,
That might've given you a fright.

© 2014 Fréyjä Helvití



Author's Note

Fréyjä Helvití
I've been gone for a long while now. To be honest, it was difficult for me to come up with a new composition being stuck in writer's block. This is just a raw draft. One of my many attempts of a new poem. Be brutally honest if you must.

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Reviews

Now that you are back from writers block- this poem isn`t bad at all. i love your rhyme scheme and delightful verse techniques. K

Posted 3 Years Ago


Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

Thank you so much K.
Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

Thank you so much K.
this is a spectacular poem

Posted 3 Years Ago


Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

Thank you once again. :) Although I still feel it lacking...
You just made this fictional creature come to life in my head..terrifying and so real I see him for fear my eyes do not shutter. Creepers 100% right you have a way with words, you can make something dark and raw have a heartbeat, whether it beats to eat you alive or not that's left to the imagination but oh wow do I enjoy reading this stuff.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

I merely put more attention on the flow then the rhyming follows. Sure there are so many words that .. read more
I really don't care to much for rhyming anymore. What I really like is when you use words as if they are mere toys to you. You have a way with words that is both mesmerizing and intoxicating. Your vocabulary is strong and intelligent. I totally understand the writers block. I hope it passes and you come back strong Princess. I hope to see you here more often with new pieces of amazing creativity. I'm being brutally honest ;)

Posted 3 Years Ago


Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

Glad you liked this one too rob. Although this piece needs more re writing. Especially the ending. Y.. read more
It's alright, the rhymes were not optimal but average. It makes the poem flow nicely enough. Overall it was enjoyable. Writers block...I've been there what helps me the most is coming up with one solid line the rest will follow. My favourite lines were:
Darkness devours what's left of light,
As you fade into the dampening night.

Decent write.

Posted 3 Years Ago


Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

Yeah. I hadn't put much effort on the rhymes. My goal was to just write something, so I focused more.. read more
Vale Snipes

3 Years Ago

You are welcome...I think sometimes the read requests don't work, happens to me now and again, I som.. read more
Fréyjä Helvití

3 Years Ago

There I sent the read requests.. thanks again :)

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Added on January 13, 2014
Last Updated on January 14, 2014

Author

Fréyjä Helvití
Fréyjä Helvití

Rivendell, Middle Earth, Philippines



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