Love, If No Shame

Love, If No Shame

A Poem by Gary McDonald

To love, but not have that love returned
to feel the heat, yet not get burned
is to see her eyes and never say
that hers is the light that starts my day.

She does not know, as she does not hear
the words of silent scream beside her ear
that carry all the words of love
but never meet the beauty of my dove.

Soon she shall have another in her heart
a man whose life it is to steal my part
a part hidden behind my only shame
as with all her beauty, I know not her name.

© 2009 Gary McDonald



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Woeful write... The feelings of upcoming replacement..Very good structure, nice and tight
Nicely done again my Brit Poet!!

Posted 7 Years Ago


Finally, someone that isn't a fourteen year-old girl. There are so very many of those on this site. This one is short, but says a lot in its twelve lines. Your structure and rhythm are very good, and it's a powerful work. My one criticism would be the lack of immersion; it feels like I'm outside looking in at the author, rather than beside him (or better still, one with him). That may just be the nature of the beast, however, as immersion is difficult with something this short. Well done regardless.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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546 Views
2 Reviews
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Added on December 27, 2009
Last Updated on December 28, 2009
Tags: shame, love, light, heat, name, beauty

Author

Gary McDonald
Gary McDonald

Crawley, West-Sussex, United Kingdom



About
Do not love for the love of another, nor seek the sights already sought, live for the lives of the many, and your days will in time be taught. Gary I'll be swinging in from time to time, but.. more..

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