Psychosis of Esmerelda

Psychosis of Esmerelda

A Poem by Gary H
"

Many thanks to Edgar Allan Poe and Natalie C, without whom this would not have appeared.

"
Esmerelda


Rationality transmutes to invisible,
Periods of pertinacity emerge from my disposition,
Reminiscence of sensations
I recourse with retinence to deny desire,
Living in corrective exactitude
I am the embodiment of elevated endurance,
Circumspection designing nuances of a consummate indication
Observing my vogue of a deviant predicament.


Prospection discriminates through light,
Presurmising recognition of an untrodden guise,
Encountering this inexpressible desperation,
Reacting in an instant I undertake to confide,
Pressing forwards on indifferent sharpened engrave,
To succour a disclosure of concealed assertions.


Disenchantments are expurgated, flushed afar
Whilst endeavouring the discover of symmetry,
Internal in fissures of capricious existence,
Plundering transcendental until no resistance
Retaining an everlasting gaze,
Attentive to liquidity flowing,
Fulfilling a pulsation of enduring vitality.


Scarlet rust, viscous fluid,
No occasion did I solicit my retrospections
That this prevelance would hitherto propound
A power within this eternally severed sufferance,
Impudently persuing this sombre passage
Penetrating into a cosmos so precarious.


Prohibited sympathiser, so silent,
Charmer of my affections,
You grip and possess me.
Ligature binded with longing, you have decieved me,
Impetuous for your enravishment,
Now relinqished in the unilluminated
Only visible as the emanation of a breathing immolation
Exposed, alone, cloaked forever in captivated crimson.


© 2008 Gary H



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I have a complete volume of Poe, but am yet to reach the poetry because the stories are slowing me down; I can't handle more than about two a day, because his style sometimes irritates me. I bought it FOR the poetry though, so I really should hurry up...and it was because lots of reviews on the Cafe kept referring to him, comparing the work of others to it.
So I can't yet comment on how 'Poe-esque' I felt this to be.

Good flaunting of an extensive vocabulary; the resonance of all these words and phrases was pretty cool."Endeavour[ing]" is used in the third and fourth stanza - if not deliberate, I suggest finding an alternative for one of them; the repetition stands out because so much effort has gone into creating a piece consisting of lesser-known words.

Overall, good work.
Cheers for sharing.

Posted 9 Years Ago


4 of 4 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Great work!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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Rin
Waw, I really like how great your vocabulary is. I'm sorry I couldn't really follow it, I'll read it again when I find my dictionary though.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is a quite stunning display of poetry...POE would be pleased. I think you have captured her "psychosis" amazingly well...as this piece is so complex. It seems she cuts or kills herself with her own thoughts. Impressive piece :)

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I am agreeing with the previous reviews, the words used in this piece are very thought provoking and I too had to read it a few times through to get to the heart of the piece. You words speak to the emotion of the piece. Very well written!
xoxo

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Definitely, the use of vocabulary is stunning and daunting at times yet appealing at the same time...such powerful emotion is displayed at the end...well done. Thank you.
Light,
Siddartha


Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

I read this through three times, sifting through your words and the emotions before I felt that I could even write a few words about it.
The words you have chosen show the work you have put into this piece, choosing a vocabulary that is not spoken in daily conversations or written in daily correspondences. Though the words take some studying and a few times reading, it shows the dedication it took to write this piece.

"I recourse with retinence to deny desire,..."

I like the feeling of desire in this piece, a desire, a love, a need so great, yet one that must remain ---

"Exposed, alone, cloaked forever in captivated crimson."

Well done!

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Yes, I'm assuming a lot of work went into the vocabulary... either that or you just happen to have a very extensive one yourself. I think it is appropriate that the reader also has to work to read this. You can't just skim over it. That might put a lot of readers off, but that is their loss.

At first my mind just picked individual lines that stood out as on the first reading or two it is hard to assimilate such extensive vocabulary and transform it into emotion. You tend to work hard to just gain an understanding and then once that is achieved you can read the poem more emotionally.

Ligature binded with longing - I liked this line.

Something about the deliberate language gives this piece an obsessive tone that definitely works for psychosis.

Good, thoughtful stuff.









Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

It is indeed a work reflective of Poe. I found I had to hike up the hem of my skirt to find my way through the deep tangle of words in the dark underbrush you wove. I found myself lost in gnarled thickets from time to time and had to double back upon your words to try and gather the fruit of their meaning.

There is an obvious propensity of antiquated vocabulary in your piece. I believe that it is a tip of the hat to the style and Victorian era of Poe and thus whilst difficult for the modern reader to traverse well or easily it is extraordinarily appropriate and well done.



Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

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Oz
The English language is wonderful and I think you've made good use of it with this poem. The vocabulary used in this poem impresses me. You've used a unique and powerful method to show this creature's state of mind. Your words are powerful and forceful and create an intense tone.

My favorite passage...

Attentive to liquidity flowing,
Fulfilling a pulsation of enduring vitality.


Great job Gary!


-Oz


Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

"Reacting in an instant I endeavour to confide"
"Whilst endeavouring the discover of symmetry"

Maybe it was deliberate, because referring to the same context? I couldn't tell.

Posted 9 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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Added on May 26, 2008
Last Updated on May 27, 2008

Author

Gary H
Gary H

nowhere, United Kingdom



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