A miracle with lover

A miracle with lover

A Poem by Gul
"

How can somebody alive with no heart??? But she did.

"
                                And the life, without any beat
                                No sweet, sorrow and tweet
                                Just a lifeless breath and soul
                                Still, alive with bitter mole.

                                A repent of dedication and love
                                Not paid but darken the dove
                                My heart is no more and sunken
                                Given to him and left me drunken

                                He forgot me, as I did nothing
                                For him, died for him, anything
                                O Heart! you don't pain now
                                I wonder being alive, how?

                               "How you alive, without heart"- Dr. surprised.
                                "For only him to survive"- I replied.
                                Heart was implanted, but he died.
                                God left me with pain chide.

                               I am with pain, his memories and life
                               Without him and my heart
                               I am alive with his soul
                               But he died with my heart.
                               

                               

© 2017 Gul


Author's Note

Gul
I tried to write a poem, after a very long time. Guys, how's it?

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Featured Review

Very passionate poem with great imagery and metaphor. Well-written dark write about a woman who literally and figuratively gave her heart to a man who left her broken. Love the form, flow and rhythm. Kudos to you for your hard work in rhyming. Some of the words do not translate to what I think you mean, but you do get your ideas and emotions across. I think free-style might be a better choice for now, but that's just a suggestion. Great read!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Gul

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much Annette, your words mean a lot.



Reviews

' I am alive with his soul
But he died with my heart.'

Been a while since i called in.. and my goodness, am so pleased I have. Metered writing in another language takes so much hard work and focus.. and you've done so very well. Your phrasing alters a little here and there but you've leaped forward so far, can't criticise for that. The topic is sad, love so often is but for truly hurt hearts somehow the sincerity and truth shines through..

Posted 6 Years Ago


I appreciate the effort that has gone into creating this great rhyming piece. The sorrow is showcased very well and yet I felt a strength and resolve behind the words. So well written and conveyed!

Posted 6 Years Ago


Gul, you did great. I was moved. This is pure love and one who have to wake up everyday missing another.

Posted 6 Years Ago


Gul

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much!!!!!
Very passionate poem with great imagery and metaphor. Well-written dark write about a woman who literally and figuratively gave her heart to a man who left her broken. Love the form, flow and rhythm. Kudos to you for your hard work in rhyming. Some of the words do not translate to what I think you mean, but you do get your ideas and emotions across. I think free-style might be a better choice for now, but that's just a suggestion. Great read!

Posted 6 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Gul

6 Years Ago

Thank you so much Annette, your words mean a lot.
You write really well Gul :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


Gul

6 Years Ago

Thank you, I will keep it going.
Sameer Jindal

6 Years Ago

You should.
Nothing is more beautiful than reading a good piece of art. :)
This is amazing, Loved your work :)

Posted 6 Years Ago


Gul

6 Years Ago

Thank you for reviewing it.

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6 Reviews
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Added on September 24, 2017
Last Updated on October 14, 2017

Author

Gul
Gul

Ghaziabad, Uttar Pradesh, India



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