Short of Breath

Short of Breath

A Poem by Mark11
"

A poem about one of my greatest fears.

"

I'm short of breath,


Just short of breath.


Two feet short, actually.


I couldn't hold it any longer.


My hand even hit clear air.


Too late though.


Breathed it in.

Didn't know it would be so peaceful.


Serene.


Expected pain - a struggle.


Just silence met me.

What happens next then?


Guess I'll find out soon.


My vision is darkening,


The deep blue - replaced with white.


© 2011 Mark11


Author's Note

Mark11
Hope you get what this is actually about. The idea is for it to be slightly enigmatic but I hope it at least makes sense.

NB. the visual style was originally made to look like rising bubbles in the water... However no one seemed to cotton on :) but of course it could easily be more abstract than that.

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Featured Review

This is a beautiful poem. It is calm and matter of fact, even peaceful, considering it's about someone drowning. I love the way this poem is structured. The pattern adds interest and almost a drifting, breathless sensation. I really enjoyed this work:)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Different kind of set up but I enjoyed it.....xo

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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...
. scary ...
. a very scary spiral ...
. almost frightening ...
. i guess i'm not brave ...

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I'm personally not a fan of strange visual styles like this... but the poem is pretty good :) I do love a good bit of simplicity.

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is a beautiful poem. It is calm and matter of fact, even peaceful, considering it's about someone drowning. I love the way this poem is structured. The pattern adds interest and almost a drifting, breathless sensation. I really enjoyed this work:)

Posted 12 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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348 Views
4 Reviews
Rating
Added on August 15, 2011
Last Updated on August 16, 2011
Tags: drowning, last moments, reflection, reflective

Author

Mark11
Mark11

Truro, Cornwall, United Kingdom



About
Hi I'm Mark Read, and I live up to my name. Lets just say that I hope one day to be more of a Mark Write so I joined this site Favourite Quote, from Wise Man's Fear by Patrick Rothfuss: "...Tec.. more..

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