My final breath, a sigh

My final breath, a sigh

A Poem by Gee
"

Accepting the inevitable

"
I had neither time nor patience
and this I so relayed,
annoyance being the tone I used
but still the stranger stayed.

I bid him sit if stay he must
offering him a chair,
this he declined without a word
but with a steely glare.

That chilled my bones to marrows core
withering my very soul,
a shadow crossing o'er my heart
a shadow black as coal.

It was then I knew my time was his
he'd called to still the hands,
to lead me from this mortal coil
and to the promised lands.

So silently I left with him
my final breath a sigh,
of sadness that my life was done
and this my time to die............


























© 2017 Gee



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Reviews

Its only a game of cricket! Its not the end all be all scenario theres still some tests to go then take your last breath

Posted 6 Days Ago


Gee

6 Days Ago

Lol, I know it's gonna get worse.
andrew mitchell

6 Days Ago

Being an Aussie I can only hope cos when we play you guys in England, the pitches are tailored made .. read more
Gee

5 Days Ago

If the ball doesn't ing were shagged....snowing ere....I HATE SNOW
“Rage, rage against the dying of the light”...no-one gets out of this place alive...this a dark, eloquent, beautifully laid poem with great form, wordage, cadence, rhyme. The metaphor of the reaper paying a final visit “he’d called to still the hands”- brilliant work Gee!

Posted 6 Days Ago


Gee

6 Days Ago

Thank you Annette
Annette Pisano Higley

5 Days Ago

You are welcome!
This is beautifully written, and strongly reminds me of "Because I Could Not Stop For Death" by Emily Dickinson

the simple meter adds complexity to the piece as well, and the colorful language was thoroughly enjoyed in this. I look forward to reading more of your work. Feel free to check some of my stuff out as well if you get a chance :)

Posted 6 Days Ago


Gee

6 Days Ago

Will do. Cheers JB
Awesome poem! I really like the underlying darkness that starts from the beginning. Keep up the good work!

Posted 3 Months Ago


Gee

3 Months Ago

Cheers....
I enjoyed reading this ballad; it reminded me of Emily Dickinson in structure and in subject (she was obsessed with death, as I've no doubt you're aware). Nice to see that you managed to stick to the conventions of the form (alternating tetrameter and trimeter), as this is rare and takes discipline.

Posted 3 Months Ago


Gee

3 Months Ago

Thank you. The form is just pot luck, I write and read back just to ensure that the piece is not to .. read more
That anonymous visitor will call with us all at some point or another, and his entreat is a one way ticket to wherever?

Marvellously moribund and foreboding, loved it!!

Posted 5 Months Ago


Gee

5 Months Ago

Thank you Tom
Beautiful
I have to write at least 25 words but beautiful is all I have.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Thank you..
this so good and so wonderful to read!

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Thank you...
very nice to read no time no patience

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Cheers.....
Simple rhyming with simple words ... but oh so effective. You had me sitting on the edge of my chair, wondering if I too was about to breath my last breath! Good poem.

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Cheers, simple is as simple does

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1494 Views
50 Reviews
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Shelved in 1 Library
Added on May 30, 2016
Last Updated on April 22, 2017
Tags: Life, death, time

Author

Gee
Gee

Milton keynes, Buckinghamshire, United Kingdom



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No airs and graces, just a simple fella posting simple words. more..

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