Twelve Shoes

Twelve Shoes

A Poem by Gee
"

The last journey of a loved one

"
Black filled the pews
not one head raised
each bowed as if in prayer,
twelve shoes
six steps in unison,
slow bore their reason there.

Down aged flags
that echoed loud
off stone and ancient glass,
these men of death
clad dark as night
heartbroken lines did pass.

As footsteps stilled
amazing Grace
through oaken beams soared high,
grief seared the cheeks
washed broken hearts
that questioned only "Why"

Then silence reigned
the air hung still
lost love they gently laid,
twelve shoes they bowed
then took their leave
having last respects thus paid.



















© 2017 Gee



Author's Note

Gee
Dipping a toe in the solemn, been a while. If any ideas to improve feel free, I'm always willing to learn. Thank you
2nd stanza to be changed perhaps
Flags are flagstones, slabs of stone

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Reviews

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MCS
Well done, felt these words deeply

Posted 5 Months Ago


Gee

5 Months Ago

Cheers, appreciate the review
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Lou
Really moving poem beautifully written , love the twelve shoes analogy.

Posted 5 Months Ago


Gee

5 Months Ago

Cheers Lou, glad you enjoyed the read.
No, i don't think you should change the 2nd Stanza. It is 'dark' but then so is death! And it has a solemn but satisfactory end. and , yes indeed, 'why' ... perhaps the music in the oaken beams is all we need to know! Enjoyed your poem

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Thank you Aunty
beautiful. I almost cried remembering the last funeral I went to. You captured the air perfectly and the certain sense of sadness and helplessness, with dignity and respect. I liked this a lot.

Posted 6 Months Ago


Gee

6 Months Ago

Thank you..
This writeup has a grace, free flow and a certain melancholy to it that is conveyed through each stanza beatifically :)
Thanks for sharing!

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Thank you for reviewing
Oh wow this is touching .. I love it great work

Posted 7 Months Ago


Gee

7 Months Ago

Thank you...
Writing Angel

7 Months Ago

Thank you writing it
A amazing story written in the poetry. I like the places and thoughts shared. You create a life and a journey. I liked how you used the twelve shoes in the poem. Thank you Gee for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

Posted 8 Months Ago


Gee

8 Months Ago

Cheers Coyote
Coyote Poetry

8 Months Ago

Cheers back to you my friend.
This write is beautifully heavy.. Each verse brought more silence and then the silence reigned in my heart. Thank you for sharing....

Posted 9 Months Ago


Gee

9 Months Ago

Thank you Bala, one of my semi sensible scribblings
Bala Gorthi

9 Months Ago

Not all can bring out such perfect pieces from semi sensible scribblings. Keep sending more semi scr.. read more
Gee

9 Months Ago

Lol, cheers...
And the pattern is ad infinitum. Whether horizontal, or hanging as 'Strange Fruit'. Well done.

Posted 10 Months Ago


Gee

10 Months Ago

Cheers Joe, appreciate the review
You set the tone very well. Leading the reader into the scene like a spectator as if you were whispering this into their ears - quietly - out of reverance.
Twelve shoes is a really poignant visual - the pallbearers.
The single word "Why?" is excruciatingly loud in this setting.
Absolutely well written poem Gee.

Posted 11 Months Ago


Great Aunt Astri

6 Months Ago

Couldn't understand a word of this man talk ...... could you translate it into to woman talk, please.. read more
Gee

6 Months Ago

I've just read this exchange back and it is just a normal man conversation, well, between us two it .. read more
Great Aunt Astri

6 Months Ago

Well, I wanted to join in too!!!!!!!!

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1396 Views
49 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on October 8, 2016
Last Updated on September 16, 2017
Tags: Love, death, funeral, mourning

Author

Gee
Gee

Milton Keynes, United Kingdom



About
Simple words. If you want " clever " look elsewhere, if not, feel free to browse. more..

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